curly

iTrader: (25)

I believe it represents his fashion sense?

Slayer

iTrader: (6)

I think most women would find aloha shirts quite acceptable as long as:

1) it is not tucked in
2) you're not wearing a belt
3) you're not wearing jeans or jorts
4) it is at least 75F outdoors
5) you’re wearing sandals, not shoes (especially big white new balance shoes)
6) you're not wearing a mesh trucker hat that says “Maui” on it
7) you do not have a camera around your neck
8) you are not wearing the aloha shirt to conceal an enormous belly

mgeoffriau

iTrader: (7)

Actually, I think we already covered the appropriate car for someone who wears primarily aloha shirts.

Joe Perez

iTrader: (8)

I backtracked the URL. It's from some TV show called "what not to wear."


Uhm, well, I'm good on #6-#8.



I do have the correct hair and mustache. (Well, it's not quite as bushy, but the same general concept.)

Also, note that Tom Selleck's Hawaiian shirt is tucked into his jeans, and he is wearing a belt.

ScottFW

iTrader: (4)

Sorry, I just don't see the appeal of the SLK 320. The '03-up SL 500, sure, the interior looks purposeful, it has longer more agile-looking body lines, and it generally looks like it could have a successful man behind the wheel. The SLK just looks like a short boxy girl's toy car. It looks girlier to me than a NA Miata and there are a very small number of cars on that list. Have you considered a VW Cabriolet?

If it's between the SL 500 and a Porsche and you can afford the latter, then it's not much of a contest. The SL 500 may be a vert with a V8 but it's just not that fast because it's heavier than my 4runner by more than 200 lbs. A standard 996 is about a full second faster 0-60.

Those people in the pic have a reality show where they come into your house, take anything they deem unfashionable out of your closet and throw it in the garbage, and then give you money to buy some proper attire. My wife has threatened to call them on me and I don't even wear Hawaiian shirts every day.

gearhead_318

iTrader: (1)

It is almost never appropriate for a man looking to meet a female to ware a Hawaiian* shirt or jorts**
*unless your actually in Hawaii
**Unless your in Florida, in which case nothing matters, dress however you like since your in Florida.

Just get a 930 or a 996 turbo. Or a G55 AMG.

Stein

iTrader: (46)

I love my 335i. It's funny, people think I spent WAY more than Camry money for it, 300HP,300TQ stock. All women know about cars is what is on the hood/decklid.

As a CPO it was a $28K car that has 30 months/70K left on warranty. My boss, who drives a brand new 550i tells me at least once a week that the E90 3 series is the best looking BMW going today and he just dropped $75K on his.

gearhead_318

iTrader: (1)

http://jalopnik.com/5861242/for-2750...-in-your-pants

dstn2bdoa

iTrader: (18)

Joe, When I started reading this thread last night. I said to my wife (who likes you BTW) "Joe is looking to upgrade his car, so to not repel professional women". The first thing she says is "well he better get rid of that stupid hat" Then she says "If he's serious, let me know and I'll take him shopping". I guess she thinks that your putting the cart before the horse Don't get butt hurt, if you remember she doesn't like my hats either.

As far as cars go. I REALLY like that 635CSi that Hustler posted up.

Merc vs Porsche is easy. Unless you going with a classic merc the Porsche is the clear winner. We have a huge Mercedes dealer ship near where I work. While recently doing an inspection of the place an associate of mine joked if she (the Merc rep) had any to give away. She stopped in her tracks, turned around and said that she wouldn't take one if they gave it to her. She said do yourself a favor and walk across the street and buy one of our Audi's. She mimicked what was said here earlier, that gone are the days of the reliable Mercedes. Their service bay is constantly packed.

JasonC SBB

You mean the one *I* put up that Hustler quoted.

Stein

iTrader: (46)

I was running out the door when I posted above. I wanted to flesh it out a bit.

The BMW 335i in coupe or sedan are very small cars. Coming from a Miata it will surprise you how small they are. And, they drive small. No kidding, it's smaller in all dimensions than my wife's 07 Nissan Sentra.

There are a few cost drivers that I didn't require that push the cars well into the $30's.

iDrive. I didn't need it. Just more **** to break.

Sport suspension. Larger wheels, better suspension and really nice seats. I'd like the seats but for a DD the standard suspension is plenty stiff. This shaves thousands in resale.

Manual/Auto trans. The 6 speeds are nice but they are rare and most sell on enthusiast sites. I really like the auto in these cars. They have been found to be pretty much trouble free. Less so when one considers replacing clutches.

That pushes 3 year old lease returns under $30K easily. Get a CPO. End of story. The cost difference is negligible if you shop around and an extra two years and 60K+ miles of warranty is worth it.

That said, the fit and finish are excellent, leather and wood throughout makes it a rich appearing interior. There are so many little niceties in the car - things I never thought of but really enjoy.

The door handles have led's in them when you hit the remote.

Passenger rear view mirror angles down when you put it in reverse so you can see the curb before you hit it.

Adaptive headlights turn when you turn the wheel to look around corners

Extremely, and I mean extremely nice 420 watt stereo system. I always fancied myself a bit of an audiophile and I can't believe how good this thing sounds.

Just tons of little things that make me still say, "I got all of this for the same money that I almost spent on a new turbo Kia Optima". Yes, I was really seriously considering that.

My last word on performance. It is $479 away from 380HP/400TQ. In a 3,200 lb car. Enough said.

Oh, one final thing - the insurance on my 08 335i is less than the same coverage on my 05 Dodge quad cab 4x4.

y8s

iTrader: (8)

replace hawaiian shirt with this jazz and you can still drive the miata. youll also need cufflinks.




I should point out here that the readers of this thread be made very aware that in California, you can buy Hawaiian shirts at SUPERMARKETS. How do I know?

I have two from Albertsons...

They don't get worn much anymore. Last time both were worn at the same time for a blue hawaiian party. Elvis and blue cocktails.

This is an appropriate use of a hawaiian shirt:
Theme party.
(and fits all the criteria listed above)

sixshooter

iTrader: (12)

Joe doesn't need to get laid. Joe needs a sensible companion... to screw...
Reasonable idea after having ridden in the passenger seat of one.
Unfortunately true. But Joe is no "respected man." He is Joe, crusader for the release of the unjustly imprisoned MS3X schematics.

So ******* true.

Note to Joe: 'Start racing said car.'

Yep, it is true. Hardtop looks too much like a 911 for honeys to know or care the difference and the handling balance is better.
I know a former stripper (25% of Tampa) who manages a strip club that has an SLK. I have never met a man who owns one. The 996s are a bargain because of he catastrophic engine problems tha plague them. Check the latest edition of Grassroots Motorsports for the article about the guy who is swapping in LSXs because the 996 Porsche engines are dying left and right and not worth fixing.
I fawking hate Saabs too, but the 9x-7 Aero with the 6.0 aluminum V8 and AWD would make a great tow vehicle for Messieur Perez's race car. Make it a rotisserie and I will begrudgingly endure the fire.


So much truth in this it should be carved in granite.


That is much less girly than the earlier models.

I begrudgingly have to agree. They are nice and you should test drive one for comparison's sake.

But the most important thing I read here is that you shouldn't be someone you are not when it comes to image when shopping for a good mate. It is a sure road to an ugly divorce. Find a girl that is fine with your interests and really gets where you are coming from. It may not be the executive woman that would make you the most happy. She doesn't need an need an equivalent income to be an intellectual match. She just needs to respect you and you need to love and respect her.

sixshooter

iTrader: (12)

Hawaiian shirts are perfectly acceptable in most parts of South Florida (where Joe is from) as day and evening wear. I have a couple and my 68 year old Cuban drinking buddy named Fernando wears them all the time. He wears his a lot more often than I do. It was 86*F today...

Cufflinks? U B trollin.

BTW, she doesn't look very Hawaiian, lol.

gearhead_318

iTrader: (1)

It's something that you need to have 'Cause when she leave yo *** she gone leave with half.

-The great homosexual fish-poet Kayne West.

930 Porsche.

y8s

iTrader: (8)

So I guess it's like African guys who wear Dashikis... only Floridians decided to go with a pacific islander style instead of golf pants as their costume.

The point is.. Joe spends his time in southern california and new york city. most chicks he meets and wants to impress with his respectability are going to see the shirt before the car.

cufflinks are just an easy way to apply some real nerd to the shirt and look stylish as **** doing it.



SO yeah... the current gen SLK and some well-fitting french cuff shirts (even with current jeans and boots that are standard Perez issue) and Joe could pull up to some random Manhattan bar, walk in, and sidle up to a Respectable Woman and share with her a large bottle of rum, as is his custom.

y8s

iTrader: (8)

I think if you're considering marryng a woman that requires a pre-nup, don't bother. save the money you'd have spent on the wedding and just date her indefinitely. when you dont ask her to get married, you'll find out her true colors.

y8s

iTrader: (8)

I want to point out here as my last salient point for the evening a plus one for this sentiment. And I wanted to point out something else:

Here is what I was driving when I started seeing my now-wife (again):


Here is what I was driving when we met 15 years prior :
(a red one..)

Opti

2nd Gen GTS Viper (Seen them in the mid 20s)

BMWs are good ideas.

Please dont buy a Merc. I make so much money servicing them, but I wouldnt wish that evil on most people.

I still day Gen 1 CTS-V (Dont knock it till youve tried it) They drive great.


I do love NSXs especially the NA1 (I think thats the designation for the pop up headlight body style) but they are pretty damn expensive to maintain.

C5 Vette, get the FRC or Z06 body. Its more purdy (Has Fikses for Hustler). Seen them as low as the teens for higher mileage ones. Cheap to maintain except for on corvette specific parts in which case you must pay the vette tax, and get the **** run flats off.
Dead nuts reliable


C6 Ive seen them in the high 20s.

soviet

iTrader: (10)

I don't think the car is the problem. Hawaiian shirts are no-go. I own about 95 t-shirts but my current girlfriend I met while wearing a dress shirt and a tie. And yeah, french cuffs + cufflinks. Women notice cufflinks. It takes about 3 seconds extra but the effort is worth it.