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Old 08-13-2010, 02:47 PM   #2541
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Bet your *** I was winded...for a couple of minutes.
Umm..btw...like every other stair case, they double back so there is no way I could fall all the way down? I've also raced the elevator from 10 to the bottom, it made one stop but I still beat it. Won't do that again.





So does anyone else hate when you sitting down and blow out a raunchy fart...like one so bad you leave where you are but you can't get away from it because its in your shirt and creeping out the collar right under your nose? I just walked half way across the office and still had that **** following me around. Next time I'm going crop-dusting.
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Old 08-13-2010, 02:53 PM   #2542
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doppelgänger View Post

"My grandms once got arrested at Bass Pro Shops because they accused her of stealing a duck call and some Deer Bomb when all she had eaten a burrito and walking around the womans bathroom" (or some **** like that)

People really find that **** funny?
if you're an inbred redneck, probably
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Old 08-13-2010, 03:01 PM   #2543
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doppelgänger View Post
On a side note.

Does anyone else find those "Blue Collay Comedy Tour" ******* annoying as ****? My God do I feel insulted when they open their mouths. I had one of my TVs at work on Com. Cent. while I was watching Daily Show/Colbert and this **** came on afterwords. I didn't feel like finding something else to put on that TV and left it on. I could only take about 5 minuts of that **** as background noise before I had to turn it off. **** is sooooo lame..how do people find that **** funny?

"My grandms once got arrested at Bass Pro Shops because they accused her of stealing a duck call and some Deer Bomb when all she had eaten a burrito and walking around the womans bathroom" (or some **** like that)

People really find that **** funny?
If an extremely intelligent person tries to have a complex conversation with an extremely unintelligent person...

The unintelligent person is likely to become confused on many of the points of conversation, will become disinterested, and will generally have a feeling that the intelligent person has made up most of their information from thin air, and is generally untrustworthy, even though every point the intelligent person made may have been dead on correct.

The intelligent person will quickly become bored with conversation, because every point that the unintelligent person is trying to prove will have already been painfully obvious to the intelligent person. The intelligent person will generally have a feeling that the unintelligent person is lazy, and generally untrustworthy, even though every point the unintelligent person made may have been dead on correct.

A similar effect is seen on people with different backgrounds/upbringings.

While you might watch them and think "that comedy is absolutely horrible, boring, tacky, and lewd", someone like myself can actually put up with them and get a few laughs. Their target audience is laughing their asses off though, because while you are correctly thinking "Nobody in their right minds would actually try to arrest someone because of how they sounded/smelled", the target audience is thinking of which of their friends or family members most closely matches the description of the person, and they are picturing them getting arrested for walking around and farting in the middle of a bass pro shops. This is funny to them.

I do recall one of Jeff's first redneck jokes years back:
"If your working TV is sitting on top of your non-working TV....you might be a redneck"

We were watching the show on a TV we had pulled out of a bedroom because grandma's old console TV had gone out.... The entire living room went up in a roar.
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Old 08-13-2010, 03:16 PM   #2544
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LOL, i finally got to listen to it:

have you ever went over a friends house to eat
and the food just aint no good
i mean the macaroni's soggy the peas are mushed
and the chicken tastes like wood
so you try to play it off like you think you can
by sayin that youre full
and then your friend says momma he's just being polite
he aint finished uh uh that's bull
so your heart starts pumpin and you think of a lie
and you say that you already ate
and your friend says man there's plenty of food
so you pile some more on your plate
while the stinky foods steamin your mind starts to dreamin
of the moment that it's time to leave
and then you look at your plate and your chickens slowly rottin
into something that looks like cheese
oh so you say that's it i got to leave this place
i dont care what these people think
im just sittin here makin myself nauseous
with this ugly food that stinks
so you bust out the door while its still closed
still sick from the food you ate
and then you run to the store for quick relief
from a bottle of kaopectate
and then you call your friend two weeks later
to see how he has been
and he says i understand about the food
baby bubbah but we're still friends


Classic!
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Old 08-13-2010, 03:42 PM   #2545
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Oh I don't mind some good gross/lewd/childish jokes...but something about those guys is really annoying..on top of the fact that they are fake as a Coach purse bought for $10 in Times Square. With that said, I'll be going to see Danial Tosh in October. That ************ makes me laugh.
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Old 08-13-2010, 03:48 PM   #2546
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....and look where rap digressed to.
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:11 PM   #2547
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hustler View Post
....and look where rap digressed to.
Word.


Last edited by levnubhin; 08-13-2010 at 04:17 PM. Reason: I'm really getting tired of fixing embed fails.
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:12 PM   #2548
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Embed fail
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:17 PM   #2549
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Embed fail
Fixed. But yes, it was fail.
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:20 PM   #2550
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam TII View Post
Fixed. But yes, it was fail.
You're welcome. Don't let it happen again.
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:23 PM   #2551
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Originally Posted by levnubhin View Post
You're welcome. Don't let it happen again.
Haha. It won't.
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:40 PM   #2552
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I finally reduced my 5 year old Nike daily-worn skate shoes to gym status.

These are my new daily:


$50 every 5 years for shoes isn't so bad
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Old 08-13-2010, 04:59 PM   #2553
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They match the green wheels you would put on your BMW.
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Old 08-13-2010, 05:14 PM   #2554
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Not to be taken lightly.
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Old 08-13-2010, 05:40 PM   #2555
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Don't make me send the attack hummingbirds.....I've been feeding them liquid lazer....



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Old 08-13-2010, 05:49 PM   #2556
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What is it about balding middle aged men driving minivans that makes me feel bad?
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Old 08-13-2010, 05:57 PM   #2557
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Because you know you'll be there one day....
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Old 08-13-2010, 06:01 PM   #2558
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Heeeeelllll no. The balding part yea, minivan as a daily driver, please kill me.
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Old 08-13-2010, 06:04 PM   #2559
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Quote:
Originally Posted by buffon01 View Post
nemesis! Nemesis!! Neeeemesiiiis!!!!
LOVE that video. Now i need to watch it again...
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Old 08-13-2010, 06:10 PM   #2560
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post on FB MT page you noobs.
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