Cooler heads prevail
 

Sometimes I wish I wasn't a cop and mature and responsible and all that.

I was driving in the Miata on the way to a gas station. I'm cruising about 10 over in the left lane while traffic is going a bit slower in the center lane. Right as I pass a green Suburban in the middle lane he jumps over and is basically up my ass. Light had already turned red so I'm in the process of slowing down anyways. Suburban is now acting like he's trying to rear end me; gunning it to get up to my back bumper and letting off a few feet. Fuck him, I downshift and slow down even more. Not brake checking him, just slowing down and aggravating him some. If he hits me he's buying me a new bumper. Remember the light's red anyways. His antics are getting worse so instead of stopping in my lane I pull into the left turn lane so we're next to each other.

He's got his window down and cussing at me so I roll down my window and ask him what his fucking problem is. Apparently he thought I was going fast and slowed down on purpose when I was beside him, thus forcing him to stay in the slow lane. Like most idiot driver's with their heads up their asses, they don't look far ahead enough to realize the light had turn red, hence why I was slowing down.

He's mad, I'm getting there, there's no point in me explaining to him what a dumbass he is so I let him go on about how my car is a fag car, etc etc. Nothing new or creative really. I understand my car is a fag car and I don't give a shit. If you've ever called a Miata a fag car out of anger to the owner it's because you're not sharp enough to come up with a real insult. I don't really remember what I say but he runs out of words and spits on my mother fucking car.

Several thoughts crossed my mind.
1. Exit car and break his nose
2. Call dispatch and report a reckless driver/dousche bag
3. Ignore him

Problem with 1. is I may lose my job if I got caught. We had enough witnesses around watching us yelling at each other. Option number 2 is lame and I didn't want to tie up an officer on a bullshit call due to my tempter. I know I don't like working chickenshit disturbances like this when I'm at work. So I kind of did number 3.

I was in the left turn lane and didn't want to turn left so when the light turned green I whent straight and hammered it all the way to 4th gear. Car was pretty much spinning the rear tires and somewhat sideways the entire time. Fuck him. I calm down and cruise along. Apparently dousche bag wasn't done and caught up to me and tried to sideswipe me. As he's passing me he's brandishing a hammer.

A hammer? Is he fucking retarded? We're in the State of Texas. This guy had Oklahoma plates and apparently doesn't understand Texas. He doesn't know I have a gun and I came very, very, very close to challenging him. I tailed him for a bit and finally decided to calm down. I had already taken my seatbelt off and unlocked my doors anticipating getting out quickly and doing something I may or may not have regret before cooler heads prevailed. If I were king it wouldn't be illegal to shoot dumbasses.

To add insult to injury none of the 4 gas stations I stopped at had 93 octane due to the shortage from Hurricane Ike.

So now I'm at home, drinking a beer and trying to forget everything.

Should have got him to follow you home, then legally popped a cap in his ass. Hate stupid people. Don't sweat it though, what goes around comes around. Always does.

Squirt gun full of paint remover. He'll just laugh when you are next to him squirting the car at the light. Call you a dumb ass, laugh and drive away.

Quality squirt gun $20. Paint remover $15. Look on his face when he see's the damage later? Priceless.

why not just yell over that you're a cop and have a nice day?

So just a quick list
reckless driving
speeding
following too closely
other misc failure to maintain lane and traffic offenses
assaulting a police officer
threatening a police officer with a deadly weapon

And you let him go? That guy needed some silver bracelets and a night in a small box.

Glad you are OK, as after all that is what is most important at the end of the day. The last idiot that did something like this to me ended up putting a gun in my face when we stopped. That's the incentive I needed to get my carry permit.

when I am in a situation similar to that I usually get crazy road rage and pretty much go as far as I possibly can to fuck the other person over.......then when im back home and calm, or have some time to think about I usually regret wasting my energy and putting myself at risk for worthless assholes like that. good job keeping your cool, not a lot of people can do that, and glad ur ok.

maybe flash the badge to see how fast he shuts his mouth?

seriously though, i consider someone trying to run me off the road a threat against my life

In this case, would it be unethical or anything to flash the badge? Especially after the hammer came out?

Chris

A hammer could kill; I think I would have pulled my gun if I were you. And like 18psi, I have been guilty of road-rage more than once.

Glad to hear you are smarter/luckier than both of us.

At the red light I would have been close... After the hammer I would have calmly followed him until another stop. Calmly exit the vehicle with pistol drawn and badge clearly presented. After identification that you're an officer, the free hand would have opened up your cellular phone and requested assistance. Not the hammer, but he tried to hit your car with his, thats assaulting a police officer if he hit you or not.

After your backup arrives and hes pulled from his truck, along with all his passengers, cuffed and sitting in squad cars I'd have a little chat with him. Tell him hes not from the area, but that doens't mean he can be a douche to random people in traffic just because he doens't like how you're driving. Inform him of the very serious charges pending him for road rage, wreckless driving, oh, and assaulting a law enforcement offical. Thats some serious time, and theres plenty of witnesses around as you already stated. Make him and his passengers sweat their asses off, then tell him you've decided it was enough to teach him a lesson. Let him go, but inform him that next time he'll be going to jail. Also don't forget to add in the little tidbits that hes in texas and 9/10 people carry and even cops drive "little ------ cars" like Miatas. :bowrofl:

That'll teach the jerkoff a lesson.

Take his photograph and post it on the interweb, pwned.

that guy needs a hydroshok to the chest

should have flashed the badge. I'm sure he would have changed his tune. And the hammer and sideswiping to me would indicate someone who needs to get arrested before he kills someone.

I don't even carry an off-duty badge since I just leave it on my uniform and I'm too cheap to order another one.

When he flashed the hammer he was driving away, so not a direct threat. If I followed I would've been the one escalating the situation. Could I have articulated a good reason for confronting him? Yup, I'm really good at that. Seriously though, it wouldn't have been worth it. I would've enjoyed it though.

At worst I would've had a class C criminal mischief for spitting on my car. Perhaps disorderly conduct for the hammer but it just wouldn't have been worth it to get on duty units involved when the situation would have been easily solved by me not following.

To be honest, at the moment I didn't want the law involved because I was contemplating breaking a few. In the end, I got to come home and drink a cold Guiness. Life is good again.

They have these stupid laws now about road rage and shit. A fight should be a misdominor. Stupid guys like that need a lesson. But if you defend yourself. You lose your job. the past 10 yrs have passed some unthought through laws that impower criminals and screw us good guys over.
Im not against the law. But the grey area should be thought through.

You did good, I hate idiots like that.

Oh don't forget "hate crime"...Judges are pretty strict on that one now a days. But I feel your pain. Its not worth loosing your job sometimes over turds.

You should have started masturbating and fired a salt round at him.

It's a less than lethal solution! :bowrofl:

Is Guinness better cold than warm? LOL

2 words...


taser gun

Lol, a Texas cop keeps his calm when totally getting fucked with on the road. In Baltimore, nozzle nuts (off duty volunteer fire fighters) have nothing better to do than flash the blue and reds and shoot off their mouths about drivers minding their own business (albeit quickly) driving some twisty roads.

nozzle nut: you want to keep your license? How about driving like you've got some sense?
me: is that Sentra your patrol vehicle? (it's all I could think of, I've never seen a Sentra with flashy lights, I though Baltimore County got slick)
nozzle nut: drive like you have half a brain!
me: ??? (hey, I'm not going to jail? waaaait a minute, any real cop as visibly pissed off as this guy would have doled out some sort of citation, I was speeding after all)

As I was trying to figure shit out, the guy left, pulled a high speed right turn, drove off like he was king shit. I was utterly confused until I figured out that he had no authority, but just wanted to fuck with the guy that dusted him on some turns, I guess.


No, seriously, great job keeping your cool. I've had some bizarre road rage incidents that made me wish I was armed. One dude actually tracked me down in Lowes, after I honked at him when he cut me off. I totally tactically failed, crazy guy got the jump on me, I had thought whatever conflict (hey asshole, don't run me over!) was over. I talked the guy down, rather I let him run his mouth (gee I thought you just drove like an asshole, guess it's deeper than that). Seriously embarrassing tactical failure, store full of weapons of opportunity (and me with Arnis training), and I'm empty handed and senor asshole has a stanley retractable razor, and HUGE pair of scissors on his hip.



Damnit, I can't sleep!

Yeah, Good job keeping your cool.. I couldn't have.

I'm quite sure you could've made up charges.. cops seem to do it all the time around here. If they can't figure out something to charge you with they'll call over their Sergeant over with a fucking 21,000 page law book. :jerkit: