Finally gonna get help for my ADD
 

Been a long time coming. I didn't really know how much it was affecting my marriage until the wife had a sit-down. Both my kids were diagnosed years ago, and I've needed help since elementary school but never got it. Parents always said I needed to "try harder". Couldn't get any in the Navy until now because it would ground me... kinda shitty. But I'm done flying, gonna see a shrink and hopefully start on some meds. Been reading plenty of books this past week... opened my eyes a bunch.

Anybody else got the "hyper"?

Awesome for taking steps forward and finding a way to adapt life around it. How is one diagnosed, did you just ask a doctor?

Some significant other's have speculated I might be, but never knew how to approach my PCP about it.

No hyper here, but been seeing psychiatrist after marriage almost exploded (we have a kid too). Helped a bit with depression, but didn't get out of it what I really wanted (unrealistic expectations on my part). Do it, try to get a handle on whatever you need help with. Worst part - is not trying, everything else can work through.

Ask.

Say it's come up in relationships and such.

Often times, they give you some stuff that you ask someone that knows you well to fill out, but I'm wondering if that's just done for collateral in kids.

I've known I've had it forever, just never really had a "reason" to get it taken care of. Sounds weird, but it never bothered me at all... sure, it's impacted my life in predictable ways, but it was never a problem for me... until it became a problem for the wife. I've read a couple books this past week that focus on ADHD vs. Marriage... every page parallels exactly what's going on with the wife and I.

I'm not ready yet to recommend any specific books or support groups, but you can Amazon or Google to get started. CHADD.org and ADD.org are national-level resourses to get you started. I will recommend you read a couple books before seeing your primary-care physician so you go in armed with the basic knowledge. Lots of propaganda out there on ADD and physicians are not immune to it.

From the ADD.org website:
Seek out a psychiatrist, psychologist, or psychotherapist specializing in ADHD and related challenges if you would like to be evaluated for ADHD. While a primary care physician can typically identify signs of ADHD and give a preliminary diagnosis, they may not have the extensive ADHD-specific experience necessary to accurately diagnose and treat ADHD. Often, a primary care physician will refer you to a psychiatrist or psychologist specializing in mental health in these instances, just as they would refer you to a cardiologist for a more in-depth exploration of a heart problem. Teachers and coaches cannot diagnose ADHD.

Yea this happened to me most recently with being diagnosed with severe depression. My gf is LCSW and she recognized a host of patterns but created an ultimatum when things got bad between us. She's good about separating work from relationship, so I had to proactively seek help. Among pride issues and fear, I had put it off for too long.

ADD had always been in the back of my mind, but for much of my extended academic career, I never had health insurance to even address this among other chronic health problems.

Either way, I'm curious, interested, and will be following discussion in this thread. Anything to understand, if not myself, but at least some of my close friends better.

Not in myself, but my wife and daughter are both ADHD.

http://www.feelingoodtees.com/Assets...D_SQUIRREL.jpg

--Ian

My adopted daughter has ADD. It manifests itself in a lack of impulse control. If she thinks of food she has to eat. If someone else presents food she must have some. If she thinks something it becomes words. If she gets a notion to be upset it goes from zero to sixty in a second. She will say later that she knew she shouldn't act a certain way but had a compulsion to do it. It ruined relationships, her health, her schooling, added to her daddy issues by making her more likely to be promiscuous, etc.

I always avoided drugs for her because I thought of ADD/ADHD as a discipline and bad parenting problem. I thought drugs would make kids compliant zombies.

Her doctor explained how the disorder works in layman's terms. There is a part of the brain that "goes to sleep" in ADD/ADHD people. That part filters and moderates impulses and responses. Without that portion of the brain being active people act on impulses as they arrive with little reservation. The Methylphenidate (Ritalin) awakens that portion of the brain and keeps it functional. She is on Methylphenidate ER (extended release) and it DOESN'T make her a zombie. It makes her thoughtful and focused in a way she should have been naturally. She is able to complete tasks, is better at moderating emotional responses, and can pay attention and learn in a way she never could before. She has lost weight because she eats thoughtfully and at the appropriate times. She's making much better decisions and has an improved self-image.

If I could eliminate social media from her life she would be better off still. Sigh...

Officially long over due diagnosed in my late 20s. Just the ADD side of things, lacking the hyper side. Meds were a game changer, but I'm not much for them and it hasn't hurt me to much... having figured out my own sort of coping skills over the years.. so yeah I don't really take them on a regular basis.

Definitely worth doing the full talk through that covers the personal history and then the clinical testing, covers all the bases to ensure you are on the right path.

Focalin XR was the only one offered to me and did the job, supposedly low on the side affects compared to others. When I know the disorder is winning and I have to get things done... the medicine is the simple path.

Lucky for me, I'll get the best treatment the US government has to offer. Waiting for a call back now from medical on a referral. I haven't looked yet, but there are some specialists on Kauai, although references here will be tough. I'm definitely going for the full-monty evaluation... gotta get that shiz documented thoroughly for retirement benefits.

I've been on meds for 2 years know. Unfortunately, I'm also on meds for anxiety and panic attacks. I can only get a small dosage of the ADHD stuff, as it interferes with the medication for anxiety/panic. Sucks, but everyone that has known me since forever has stated how dramatic the changes have been. Funny thing is, I still feel the same way.

BTW, my mom and my sisters can tell when I'm on the meds, or not!

I might be in the minority here, but I rarely ever fill my prescription for meds. I bet there would be a ton of benefits to taking it continuously, but they make me feel weird so I tend to only take them if I'm spending the whole day studying. I could try non-stimulant meds (atomoxetine etc), but just haven't bothered.

I have a feeling that I'm going to be taking them wayyy more regularly as an intern next year though.

I'm not sure what a psychologist can do for ish other than recs for behavior modification, which can be super helpful. I'm sure a psychiatrist would love to see patients with ADD/ADHD because it's probably the least complicated thing we'd see in clinic. My point is that most pediatricians and PCP's are more than qualified to work up and treat this. The good ones know when to ask for help when things get challenging or don't work as they're supposed to. Pediatricians do a ton of psych. I saw so many kids with anxiety/depression/ADD/ADHD yada yada yada when I was on peds.

Rish,

Try talking to the doctor about lower doses, extended release, or just a different formulation. They shouldn't make you feel so weird.

Agreed, dosage changes and med changes can be good options. I think Focalin was the latest/greatest when I was diagnosed, supposed to be a variant that reduces the side effect side of the medication. XR being its extended release and it does the job in a small dosage.

Oh I've been on all the baby doses and and the XR stuff. They give me really bad dry mouth and can make me feel off at times. Also, with how variable my schedule is at times, I've ended up putting myself in the hole and taking things too late in the day and screwing up my sleep schedule.

I've seen it work super well for a lot of people, I just prefer to use it when I'm doing drudge work instead of when I'm interacting with people.

I'm sure it'd get easier once my body got used to it, but the stimulants just weren't it for me. I think the non-stimulants or modafinil would end up playing better, but I just haven't bothered yet.

Yup, I always follow a no later than noon for mine when I do take it. Bummer on not finding an ideal option..

Diagnosed in 3rd grade. Back then it was actually kind of hard to get meds. Over a year of child therapy, diagnosis in multiple situations, and a few different doctors.

Been on extended release medication since then, and I can pretty easily say it changed my life. Probably would be in jail by now without it, or dead.

TBH (might be unpopular opinion), but if you need meds just to do certain things (work, housework, chores, etc) then you don't actually need meds. If I don't take my medicine I become useless, constant babble, can't stay on topic, basically can't function in society.

Anybody who knows me in person (or has seen my build thread) knows how ADHD, and that is while taking medicine.

I have ADD, I was useless in shcool without medication. Always off somewhere in lala land and imposible to focus. As I got older the symptoms lessened and I eventually came off the medication durring college. It is not unusual to see changes with age. For better or worse.

For me now, a good dose of caffeine (ADD/ADHD people actually process stimulents differently) is enough to keep me focused enough for work now. And is way cheaper than the monthly doctor visit for a controlled substance...

Not everyone has to have the same degree of a pathology and/or disability for it to be real! Some things exist on a spectrum and some are binary. I.e. ya can't really be a little bit pregnant. lol.

Yeah, I function on fuck tons of caffeine. In college I got through because I used to do endurance sports and being physically tired decreased restlessness/distraction pretty significantly. I also got by on studying the stuff I found naturally interesting and just chased the rabbit holes there and ended up with decent grades. I couldn't be bothered to do anything that didn't really hold my interest. Surprisingly nerds can have ADD/ADHD too and it presents differently for everyone. Shocking, I know.

I'm also on anti-depressants now because I have an auto immune thyroid thang that presented with depression, I decided to stay on meds after starting thyroid hormone supplementation. One of the things my anti-depressant is sometimes used off label for is..... ADD/ADHD. Not really even close to first line, but that may have helped a bit.

I'm not saying it's not real. I get it. But the number of people I know who got medicine so they could study better is really high. And I get lumped in quite often with people who just take it to pass classes. Where for me it's more so I can function day to day.

This is likely why I buy tons of go fast parts (even when I'm broke and know better) and tear shit apart while never really get shit done. Counselor says I have it to some degree but won't prescribe meds bc I also drink beer... she doesn't want me mixing it with Adderall. I'm not giving up the brew... but I need some sort organization/routine in my life - cause I basically run around like a chicken with its head cut off, doing what I can to get REAL work done... then I'm too overwhelmed to start working on the other million other things I started.
I use the VAMC here in Bham (it's not the horror story hospital like you here other places) and they've really helped me when Depression and Anxiety hit me like a Mack truck... the physical effects of Anxiety suck - thought I was dying, for real. The depression does too... I was put on Paxil and had weird side effects to it - like hyper startle reflex right when your about to go to sleep... that was almost as bad as the 2 weeks of insomnia I had. She got me on Wellbutrin and it's amazingly better... got me to the point where I stopped taking the anti-anxiety drugs and Ambien and able to sleep 8hrs straight. The ADD is still a problem though... and I have slight anxiety attacks the day after heavy drinking... so I have scaled back pretty good on killing the beer, but not 100%. Maybe i'll just have to say no more and get help on the ADD side of it... time will tell.

I mean, I don't doubt that I'd function far better day to day had I started taking this back in like middle school. But yeah, folks definitely abuse it as a study drug. I never needed it to pass classes and I just found work arounds that let me function. Everyone has different baselines and I'm naturally pretty book smart so it wasn't really that bad for me even with how disorganized I was most of the time. I think the buproprion i'm on is activating enough that it works for me.

I actually got prescribed by the school shrink and I've talked to a lot of folks like you described that went in to try to get it for study help even though they didn't state it like that. None of them did. I don't discount that folks do as you say because I've seen it a ton. Others just find workarounds and have the flexibility in their life/schedule that they can make things a bit easier. Some others, like you, need it to function at baseline.

My Shrink gave me this and said a few folks she's worked with have found it helpful. I thought it was alright.

And yeah, welbutrin/bupropion was what I'm on as well. I haven't really seen folks use it in patients that have anxiety, but if it works, it works!


Side note: I think it's pretty cool that this conversation is happening on this forum!

I have 3 kids and a wife with ADHD, 2 of them also diagnosed with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder). ADHD and ASD often go hand in hand so I tend to bundle them into the same parts bin as there is lots of cross over traits like OCD, language delay, anxiety, social delay.

Given their diagnosis, and that these disorders tend to run in families, I think there is a very high likelihood that I have some pasts of ASD as well as ADHD. (I think ADHD is very likely given the number of half completed projects in my workshop). With every member of the family with something, dinner times can be very hectic especially given most of the meds have run out at that point!

Myself and my kids are all outside the box thinkers, very logical and creative. It's the ASD / ADHD traits that drive that side of our thinking and there is a good reason why around 10% of the population have these atypical ways of mental processing. People with ADHD / ASD are often the artists, inventors, explorers who think up new ideas and provide an excellent pathway for civilisation to expand and develop new techniques without risking the general population... just those 'crazy people' willing to try jumping off the cliff. I think that goes part way to explain why I really enjoy experimentation and highly repetitive tasks (like porting a head) where most 'normal' people think it's the most tedious task ever. I have no fear of failing and get a wonderful thrill if my project works.

I'm not sure what it is like in America, but in Australia I'm very glad our schooling and society is starting to develop some understanding and tolerance for anyone with ADHD and Autism. We are getting a lot of support from the government with help, advice and financial assistance for our kids.

If anyone is looking for some good resources on ADHD or ASD have a look for Tony Attwood. He has several excellent books covering both disorders. edit: Tony more specialises in ASD but has several 3rd party recommended ADHD books on his site.

Still standing by for Medical to decide what to do with me while I'm stationed out here at the end of the earth. Just finished my 3rd book on ADHD. I read a real good one on relationships and highlighted all the parts in it where it talked about how helpful lots of sex can be for a guy with ADHD, and then left it out where the wife would find it.

MARRIAGE COUNSELING!

That went better than expected. I've never been the "counseling" type unless it was some Ensign who needed a boot up the ass and I was providing the lesson. In any case, the wife and I have been having some communication issues for a long time now. I'm a dude and therefore have no clue what she's talking about, but apparently our marriage is in distress and so I called a gal and set up an appt.

Was pretty much like I expected. Our therapist kinda reminds me of the anger management therapist in Angry Birds... very hippy/yoga/swami/new-age/eccentric/vegan/life-force/karma/holistic... anyways, pretty sure she didn't vote for Trump. But, I'm giving it my best and she does have some good advice. My ADD definitely plays a role in our marriage issues, so working on that is gonna provide some relief. The wife did say she recognizes that I'm making an effort to address our issues. Wish me luck getting laid tonight!

Good for you man!

This stuff is unlikely to hurt, but maybe it will help you in some way. Life is complicated and married life is many times more complicated.

Last night, I mentioned that how come we're the only ones doing marriage counseling (out of the dozen current couples we hang with) since a bunch of our friends all seem to have way more problems than us. She looked at me like I was crazy. She asked me how often I talk with my bro's about their marriages... obviously never. Then she tells me that practically everyone we know is either currently in counseling or schedules periodic retreats, or church group therapy stuff or whatever. Then she asked me to list off the couples we know who seem the happiest or the most miseraable, and I scored 100% on the miserable list because it was the exact list of couples she says who have never done any counseling.

I guess this is the stuff that girls talk about.

There's a good chance I may have it.
I have never talked to a professional about it, because it could potentially confirm what I would deem an unpleasant side of me.
People around me have called me hyper - ultra hyper all my life, tho.

To make matters worse, I have hypoglycemia... I get excessively jittery, short fused, and a double digit IQ version of myself when I am hungry.
Oftentimes it is too late by the time I realize I am hungry unfortunately.

I have always been told I am smart, I never have had any problem with any test I have taken and always placed very high scorewise, and I was told my IQ was 146 - if I am not hungry, that is.
I have a gigantic fear of being static, being "immobile" and having a predictable, steady life. That would be hell for me.
There has to be new challenges, problems to overcome and adventures to be had every single day.

Skiing for instance, scares me, because I try daredevil stuff. Yet I am kinda drawn to that, and - please do not blame me for admitting this - I sort of pity those who are perfectly happy on the green and blue trails.
I just started playing soccer again (had two major surgeries, so I was taking it easy for a while there), and I have to shave before each game so other players will not see my white stubble and feel awkward. I will be 57 in less than 8 weeks.

So, I know life will be hell for me the day I will no longer be able to "upshift", but the ride has been pretty nice so far.

Fuck normal.

Interesting thread. My eldest son has it, and only now at 40+ (and with a lot of help from his SO) is he getting back in control of his life.. And yes, after watching him over the years, I realise that I have also have low level ADHD too, fortunately nothing that has seriously affected my life.

Though 'unfinished projects', that box certainly gets ticked.

Good on you man, it's expensive to treat but it does help. You have to be consistent in things especially when/if they prescribe you a stimulant as it can.... upset your sleep schedule.