Notices
Insert BS here A place to discuss anything you want

The Book of Renesis

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
Old May 31, 2011 | 10:14 PM
  #1  
sixshooter's Avatar
Thread Starter
Moderator
iTrader: (12)
 
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 22,204
Total Cats: 3,560
From: Tampa, Florida
Default The Book of Renesis

Renesis

by
Sixshooter



Chapter One

IN the beginning Mazda saw that there was darkness in the land and that the car was without form. And Mazda calleth upon Tom Matano and sayeth unto him let there be jin ba ittai and there was. And it was good. And Mazda sayeth unto him it shall be called Miata and it shall be sent out abundantly before all the land and across the seas that all nations may believeth and follow. And so
it was sent forth abundantly unto all the lands and it was worshippeth by many as the one true roadster.

And so it came to pass in this land that there were people called Miatatites who praised the Miatas and did abide with them. In these days the Miatatites did build altars of burnt brake pads unto Mazda at road courses and mountain passes throughout the land. The Miatatites did hold up trophies unto Mazda and also did praise Him for his Miatas. They did abide in Mazda as His chosen people and they maketh not graven idols to SR20s and VTECs. But some amongst their number were elderly men who maketh unto the Miata abominations of style bars and windblockers and Mazda was ashamed and did facepalme. For Mazda did not send His Miata into the world to shame the world, but that the world might avoid shame through it. For all who have driven another have fallen short of the glory of Miata, but whosoever addeth a harness and tracketh his Miata shall be forever in the glory of the one true roadster.

And at that time in the land called Eng there were people called Brittons and they rose up against the Miatatites. And they prepareth to call on their god, Lucas, to smite the Miatatites. And the Brittons took up leather and felt and beams made of ash to their coachbuilders and they made a great altar to their god Lucas. And they poureth whiskey and all manner of warm beers out on the altar to Lucas and singeth their songs of praise to Colin Chapman and playeth their bagpipes and maketh obscene noises on their sidedraught carburettors before their god, Lucas. And behold, Lucas stirreth not, and they understoodeth not. And the Brittons cried out to their god Lucas and tore their tweed jackets and heaped petrol on their heads and played football with all their might and yet Lucas stirreth not and they understoodeth not. And so the Miatatites consumed them with great fury and smote them and smashed their idols to Lucas beneath their Pilotis. And the Brittons sayeth unto Lucas, “Cursed is the ground wire for thy sake.”


Chapter Two
Old May 31, 2011 | 10:49 PM
  #2  
pusha's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (5)
 
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 7,330
Total Cats: -29
From: Miami, FL
Default

this is ******* retarded
Old May 31, 2011 | 10:54 PM
  #3  
oilstain's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 836
Total Cats: 76
From: Phoenix
Default

wut
Old May 31, 2011 | 11:13 PM
  #4  
messiahx's Avatar
Senior Member
iTrader: (2)
 
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 956
Total Cats: 7
From: Shalimar, FL
Default

You catch the m.net failaids?
Old May 31, 2011 | 11:34 PM
  #5  
gearhead_318's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (1)
 
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,966
Total Cats: 21
From: SoCal
Default

I thought it was funny
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 12:43 AM
  #6  
Full_Tilt_Boogie's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (1)
 
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 5,155
Total Cats: 409
From: Jacksonville, FL
Default

That... was so ******* awesome
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 01:02 AM
  #7  
Aricjm15's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 407
Total Cats: 2
From: Grayslake IL
Default

******* epic.
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 01:24 PM
  #8  
matthewdesigns's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (8)
 
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,648
Total Cats: 55
From: WNC
Default

Good **** (says the son of a Lucasite). In for subsequent chapters.
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 01:34 PM
  #9  
spitefulcheerio's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 277
Total Cats: 3
From: Tallahassee, FL
Default

In for mt.netbible
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 01:43 PM
  #10  
kotomile's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (24)
 
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 7,537
Total Cats: 42
From: Monterey, CA
Default

Originally Posted by sixshooter
Tom Matano
Met that guy a couple times, down to Earth.
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 02:01 PM
  #11  
hustler's Avatar
Tour de Franzia
iTrader: (6)
 
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 29,085
Total Cats: 375
From: Republic of Dallas
Default

10/10
Old Jun 1, 2011 | 02:52 PM
  #12  
Sawyer's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 95
Total Cats: 0
From: Marietta, Ga
Default

Love it! Can't wait for Chapter Two.
Old Jun 2, 2011 | 11:47 AM
  #13  
Faeflora's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (2)
 
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 8,682
Total Cats: 130
From: Los Angeles, CA
Default

Lucas?
Old Jun 2, 2011 | 12:11 PM
  #14  
matthewdesigns's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (8)
 
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,648
Total Cats: 55
From: WNC
Default

http://www.mez.co.uk/lucas.html

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucas_Industries
Old Jun 2, 2011 | 04:35 PM
  #15  
jacob300zx's Avatar
Elite Member
 
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 3,211
Total Cats: 151
From: Houston, TX
Default

funny

Old Jun 2, 2011 | 04:54 PM
  #16  
trickyrix's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 335
Total Cats: 5
From: TX
Default

Awesome... waiting for Chapter Two...
Old Jun 4, 2011 | 12:59 AM
  #17  
r808's Avatar
Junior Member
iTrader: (7)
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 436
Total Cats: 0
From: Makakilo
Default

That was awesome!

What kind of horsehair seat padding did you just smoke?
Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
Quinn
Cars for sale/trade
6
Oct 23, 2016 07:58 AM
JasonC SBB
Insert BS here
3
Nov 3, 2008 04:55 PM
RockAuto
General Miata Chat
0
Sep 26, 2008 03:28 PM
Joe Perez
MEGAsquirt
44
Apr 4, 2008 10:27 PM
Ben
General Miata Chat
114
Apr 1, 2008 06:35 PM




All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:48 PM.