Guise, I'm hammered.
 

:giggle:

So on the way home I had this big bright light come on. (already using backspace key quite a bit.... yipee!)

I was thinking about the margarita thread, and how much I love margaritas. Then I thought, damn, I like red headed sluts even better!

Normally I'd make them myself, using Jager, Peach Schnapps, and Cranberry, but I'm leaving on a 4,000 miles round trip vacation to FL next week, and we've decided it's easier to pack our alcohol at home and take it with us. We're driving a rental van. :loser:

Anyway. Strolling through the liquor store I make my way to the girly isle where I find Pucker, Amaretto, and the such. I see "Red Headed Burst" and I read the label. It's a red headed slut already bottled and ready to roll, no buying the seperate items to mix them and wow, what a convenient solution to my upcoming liquor packing task. It's 40 proof, so I was skeptic. Although at 6'1" and 210, I'm such alight weight. I love it, cheap drinkin FTW.

Well, generally I make my red headed sluts as a drink, not a shot. I get home and proceed to throw hot wings in the oven and pour a tall glass. 18 minutes cook time on the hot wings. The timer was reading 3 minutes left at the very moment I realized I was feeling it.

I take the wings out of the oven and proceed to eat them off the cookie sheet standing in front of the oven (not normal... I've gotta be drunk), gulping down my RHS to ease the pain of my secret hot wing blend.

10 minutes later, I'm up here writing this post, all the while expecting to get any number of bashing responses, but too tipsy to give a hoot.

Anyway, this ends my review. DeKuyper Red Headed Burst - an easy solution to making them yourself. I'm for sure packing some of that with me on my trip. :bigtu:

PROJECT84:
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lol

Make that Projectilevomit84.

Recipe to hot wing sauce or ban.



jk, but seriously post the recipe.
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wing sauce is easy. roughly equal parts melted butter and your favorite hot sauce. or if you want you can get the original stuff from the anchor bar.

ps project84 is a woman with a drink that has both peach and cranberry in it.

I'm a big fan of Tequila Rose... could drink a whole bottle straight. Tastes like Quervo and Strawberry Quik.

The numbness is wearing off fellas, but I'm feelin thirsty!! It's only ... ahh shit it's 9pm already! WTF?

Sex on the beach has peach and cranberry, and I love them! (add vodka and orange juice to complete the mix)

Wings were Tyson Tequilla Lime, I added crushed red peppers, jalepeno tobasco, and real butter, soaked for 5 minutes then baked for 18 at 400.

Generally Tuesday nights I go to Buffalo Wild Wings and hit up their special priced "Wings Tuesdays" but I've been cutting back the funds in preparation for buying a house. So this is a casual alternative that costs roughly 1/2 as much... even w/ the bottle of happy drink.

I highly recommend it to you kind folks. DeKuyper Red Headed Burst. Good stuff.

Drink scotch, it doesnt wear off that quickly.

I vote Glenmorangie Quinta Ruben.

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Its like Muscato meets Grappa meets Brandy. Its not really a desert wine because its not that sweet. I've found nothing else like it. Oh, and 91-points so don't think its some cracked-out teenage girl drink.

Usually I'm a Southern Comfort on the rocks kinda guy if I'm home alone. I'm a bachelor, so that's pretty often. That or the classic Jack and Coke, Sailor Jerry and coke, Captain Morgan and root beer. Just did the Captain and root beer last weekend, quite tasty.

I bought a 750ml bottle and it's half gone. I just had 3 shots out of it because it was wearing off and I wanted to carry the buzz with me to bed so I could sleep easier. Been having a lot of back pain lately.

I've never had scotch. I've got some Dewar's, but I haven't touched it.

I'm gonna make everyone sick now but I want you all to try this at some point.

Blonde Headed Slut.

It's Jager, Buttershots, and milk. I know, sounds horrible. Believe me, it's like a desert. It's amazing.

Edit: Fixed intoxication errors.

I ran a gay bar for a year and didn't make drinks half this queer. I mean, we had fuckers showing up in boy-shorts and construction boots not drinking shit this queer.

So, either Hustler and I both spelled "desert" wrong, or the box of "dessert wine" is incorrect. Seeing as Hustler is fast to call people out on their illiteracy, I think we're right, despite what my nearby dictionary says.

EDIT: WTF niagra? I was just siding with you and then you go pullin my finger.

Hey drunk guy, I have stuffs for you...

Attachment 205181

Now time for me to get drunk :)

I rarely bitch about spelling errors.

I also blame the notebook computer keyboard. I've been effectively utilizing federal tax money on a real keyboard.

Where in Florida are you guys headed?

I know very little details about the vacation (think a man during his wedding planning). All I know is the city is "Rotunda West, FL" and I'm off work for 9 days. That's all I need to know. :)

Wayne, thanks for gathering the parts, bud!

It wasn't that easy. Found 10 of the long valve cover bolts in one spot, and the last one in a very different spot lol. Almost gave up but decided to check that one last place.

Have fun on your vacation!

I appreciate it Wayne. After all the time I've spent cleaning my (non running) engine/engine bay, those bolts will sure compliment my freshly painted valve cover.

Vacation doesn't start until Saturday. Got 3 more days to make it through work with nothing taking a major shit, like a boiler, or a dish machine, or an old ass Ford F700. Oh the joys of working maintenance. :)

Ha! That is Cape Haze! Ain't shit to do down there but fish, go to the beach, and drink. Zero nightlife. Wait, there used to be a titty bar southeast of there that I took some customers to once when we were on a fishing trip. Salesmen always know where the titty bars are because that's the only way certain customers will make deals with you. We're whores, don't you know!

I know a top-notch flats fishing guide down there if you are into redfish, snook, and sea trout.

We looked into the fishing license for the week and it's pretty steep. A friend said the fine for fishing w/ no license is $500 which is pretty ridiculous. I'm a big time fisherman. I love bass fishing, and that's mostly what my gear is. If there are flats though, I'd give it a try. I think we can get the license for like $35 for 3 days or something silly.

PM me or respond here w/ info, I'd really appreciate it. I'm hoping there's a pond in our community that we can do some bass fishing in.

Sucks to hear about the nightlife, the inspiration for the trip is my g/f's friend turning 21.... we were all hyped about hitting all kinds of bars/clubs. I guess it'll be lounging around the pool instead.

We did all buy snorkling gear though, and although I've never been, I'm really looking forward to it. Do you know much about the visibility this time of year in that area?

I'd rather down a pint of whiskey more than anything. Well that and a six pack.

Yeah, I do the pint thing in most parking lots when we go out to clubs/bars that want $7 for a jack and coke. No thanks, the pint costs $7 and gets me near alcohol poisoned. lol

Of course, that doesn't stop me from buying a drink to sip on, and usually forgetting my change when I hand the waitress a $20. Good-time Charlie visits my wallet on occasion. You just gotta laugh it off.

The only freshwater around there will be swampy and have gators.

But the saltwater is great. There are miles of little islands and water less than 4 feet deep where you can catch 30 to 40 inch long snook and redfish all day long. Capt. Wayne will take two or maybe three of you out for most of the day for around $300 and will always put you on the fish. He has the boat, the rods, the bait, and knows where the fish lay up. If you take a day with him, then you will know where the fish are, what they eat, and how to catch them. Then you can spend the rest of the trip finding them yourself.

Just south of where you are staying is Gasparilla Island. That is where the famous town of Boca Grande is located. Lots of million dollar homes there. On the southernmost end of that island is a beach park that is right by the inlet that leads to Charlotte Harbor. This is one place where I have snorkeled some. There were barricuda, sharks, mullet, sea trout, some fish with stripes that I can't remember the name of, and other interesting stuff near the concrete pilings right off of the north end of that beach. The water is clear. If you catch it on an incoming tide the water is clearer than at the end of the outgoing tide, though.

You only need a fishing license if you are fishing from a boat, not from the shore or a pier. And if you are with a guide they have a blanket license that covers you on their boat.

BTW-Don't speed on Gasparilla Island.

Just after you get over the bridge and onto the island there is some pretty water and beautiful sand on the right. It is a little less wavy because it is slightly sheltered from the direct gulf waves. Be careful where you park isn't a tow zone. Some roadsides are.

If you can agree on a good designated driver, I can show you where to get in trouble up in Tampa one of the weekend nights while you are down. You are a good hour and a half from the big city "fun" down there, but if you are looking for relaxation, that's a good spot. Kinda miles from everything but the water.:)

Popular tourist sites in the area include: Emerald City Strip Club and Joe Perez's house. :laugh:

scribbling down notes... Thanks!!!

I doubt we'd be up for the boat trip/fishing trip. It's not that important really, just one of those, "hey, we're gonna be down there 7 days, wtf are we gonna do besides eat and lay in the pool/ocean?" things. I suppose that's what vacationing is all about though. I wouldn't know, this will only be my second vacation ever. First was to Hilton Head Island, SC. I hope this trip can compare.

I think we'll have internet access in the Condo. I'll run it by everyone and see if they want to take a trip to Tampa... if so, I'll PM you for sure! Thanks for the invite!

My brother's bachelor party was a trip to southerm FL two years ago. We did some fishing. Here's my swordfish. He wouldn't let me bring it in for a photo as it was a six footer.

Nice catch Stein!! Okay fellas. Call me a sissy but I don't want anything to do w/ a fish that damn big. Maybe a Northern Pike, which doesn't have a harpoon for a mouth, but nothing like that.

For the life of me I can't understand why people catch shark either. I ate some fresh shark last summer in SC, it was overcooked to hell and back, but it was still just the taste/texture of most other fish.

Mmmmm Pike.

Here's my wife with a nice one. 42"

Plus a couple of nice musky for me.

Finally, hand feeding a red fox that was in camp in Canada. That wasn't a sissy move for sure, but did have a couple of beverages before hand. Sorry about the blurry pic, but the autofocus wouldn't pick up well at night.

I thought this thread was about getting drunk. Stein, I request more pics of fish with beer... or beer with fish. Everybody knows you can't really go fishing without an adult beverage or three.

Anyways, here's my current situation. That Acer is a 22" that I paid $250 about a year ago. You can get a 26" for that price nowadays. The BOSE speakers are nice for 2.0 sound. I know CNET loves the Logitech 2300's though (maybe 2.1) and I'd get some if I was in the market. Just drunk and babbling. I am in the market for a new point&shoot. Looking at a couple Sony's for sale on the SonyStyle outlet website. I really want a P&S with 720P video capture that will optical zoom while filming... and there aren't many of those out there. My current Sony T200 is FUCKING AWESOME and will do it, but I'm not ruling out a Nikon or Canon if I can find one small enough. A few Elph models are in the running. Anyways, just a little buzzed and the wife is watching the new Jada Pinkett-Smith drama and I refuse.

since we're posting vacation pics, here's my river trip. 12 buddies, 1 huge RV, 44 bottles of liquor, 64 cases of beer, 3 rivers in 3 days. The 12 of us drank 13 bottles of tuaca on the first day alone...just tuaca. One day on a raft 4 of us managed to put away 6 cases of beer. It was fucking awesome.
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loading up a melon with 100-proof absolute
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Oh...we always go down the river in costume on day 2
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lol
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and a wedding ring was thrown in the river...the bitch moved out during that trip last year.

I need to get all the pics.

So which one of those homos whas you?... and I see Ketel One and Belvedere... a step above Absolute swill.

We should make it a game.
(guessing which one is him that is)

Edit:My vote. Gotta be this ugly motherfucker:
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I'm really drunk on Costco beer right now. lol.

We actually used the Absolute 100 as lighter fluid for the most part. Everyone is either a liquor rep, wine rep, or runs a hotel. I'm the dud in the cowboy hat...no pics of me in the banana hammock striping. We had pictures of me posing all oiled up but those were lose in the great canoe topple where I almost drowned.

yep, in the middle. Sooooooooooo fucking hammered. Not one person puked on the entire trip too. We're junkie alcoholics.

This was the day after I awoke around 8pm, thinking the sun was coming up, ready to get in the river. lol

Lol, Called it!

Sounds like a blast. I definitely wanna float a river around here this summer. Only problem is that they're cold as fuck :(

Oh and Tuaca is disgusting. Everyone in Houston loves the shit though...wtf?

Huster,
2 questions:
1) How did you guys get Carl Weathers to go rafting with you?
2) Did you meet (meat) any cute Deliverance types on the trip? That looks like quite the gay crusade you have going there.

Project84,

I hope you didn't spill too many of your girly drinks on your vagina.


Frank

oh dude, it was awesome to have a football player with us. The first day was soooo brutal; a 12 mile class-4 rapid river. Everyone went in freqeuntly and two of us were hurt. He lost his paddle and somehow ended up with a little-ass broom, so the 2nd day we hit the next river and the river shack gave us a little broom with a paddle handle on it. It was hilarious to see how he (Reggie) couldn't keep up with us with the booze or the stamina.

Pretty much any woman within a mile radius had at least 6-guys hitting on her at one time. Waffle House was very entertaining.

I'm surprised no one commented on my friend's nuts yet.

So Hustler, do you pitch or catch?
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he said he ran a gay bar, remember? the only dudes I know that drink tuaca are the gays. they are also the ones resposible for leaving half-empty bottles of flavored vodkas at my house. there's a half-empty bottle of tuaca in my freezer right now that will be there for a long long time. it needs to come out to make room for something decent. i will put it on the shelf next to the skyy vanilla. :jerkit:

keep talking shit ------s. Those 5-days were basically the most manly days of my life. Drankin booze, cooking on a campfire, watching the NBA play-offs in a motor home, liquoring a watermellon, going down class 4-rapids in a kayak/raft/canoe.

Fixed. :giggle:

No, seriously... I'd love to go on a canoe/kayak trip. Both couples going on our vacation with us have kayak's and are always haggling me to buy one.

Your trip looks like it was a blast Hustler. The costume day had to have been the best part.

It's funny you have a costume day. I was telling the people going on our vacation that one day while we're there we all have to be the biggest hillbilly rednecks possible and keep mentioning how we're all from Kentucky... and speak with that "twang" everyone says we have. I bought a straw hat and haven't shaved in 2 weeks just for the occasion.

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Darth maul is gonna get tea bagged.

Tooo much ball!!!

yeah...dude could not stop-it with the trail mix shots in the kayak. lol

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Your friend w/ the nut reminds me of Patton Oswalt.

84,
Bring "Deep Woods Off!" with you because that area has those big zebra-striped mosquitoes and some nasty little fukcers called "no-see-ums" that come out around sunset. Neither are a joke. Especially if you are trying to enjoy evening drinks at the beach, a poolside, a gazebo, a balcony, or some romance after dark. No-see-ums are particularly insidious, if you aren't familiar with them.

And Pdexta is right, for things to do at night, either bring them with you, or go to the Emerald City (which is a weaksauce titty bar with "talent" that is on par with Magna's "swimmer gurl"), or go raid Joe Perez's liquor cabinet (he's out of town a lot).

Maybe I'll have the thermostat changed in my salt water boat by then and we can take it for a spin. The damned thing needs to be run a while. They don't like to sit. I think that's why one of the thermostats is sticking. We could maybe even run over to one of the uninhabited islands and look for a good snorkeling spot or just ride and sightsee by boat. I'm dragging the other boat up to Georgia to hang out at the lake and wakeboard with some buddies this weekend, but I'll probably be around next weekend if that's when you are down.

I swear you exhibit the same behavior as a gay man with low self-esteem that is stuck in the closet. Constantly striving to prove to yourself and others that you are in fact straight and manly because you partake in straight and manly things. Getting drunk (off of Tuaca) and playing grabass with 12 dudes in an RV is not straight or manly. :giggle:

Tuaca? Is that the "blue helmet" tequila or am I thinking of something else? I don't drink tequila typically.

Its not tequila, its a liqueur that tastes like freshly pounded asshole...thats why its huge amongst the gays as Y8s pointed out lol.

Are you supposed to make "slurpy noises" when you drink it, then?

Dude, I LOL'd, but gotta just wonder how you know the taste? :laugh:

Six -

We're coming down this weekend and leaving next Saturday the 27th on our trip home. Looks like I'll just miss you. Thanks for the offers and invites though man, sure beats the hospitality I'm used to.... (and I don't even have a turbo car - that runs)

Guess I'm just that cool. :)

Ha. My turbo is sitting in a cardboard box next to the computer, where it's been for months. No engine management yet... Too many irons in the fire...

You should definitely mapquest Rotunda West, FL and Boca Grande, FL and take a look at the aerial photographs and familiarize yourself with how to get there. You probably won't have good access to a computer once you get down there.

You can see the pilings I was talking about in the water on the north end of the beach at the very southwestern tip of Gasparilla Island, south of the town of Boca Grande. And there is another nice public beach between there and the town of Boca Grande. This time of year and during the week, you should have that beach to yourselves.

BTW - There are thousands of wild iguanas on Gasparilla Island. They are not native, but their population has taken off. You may see them in the dunes or even sunning themselves on the sidewalks.
Alien Iguanas Overrun Florida Island

My buddy corrected me on the Tuaca. It is not the same as "Blue Head" brand tequila which actually makes more sense to be a gay-friendly drink than Tuaca. Just think "Blew Head" and it all makes more sense.

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I'm back... DEEP WOODS OFF made me sick as a dog. :)

Had a great time despite the raging heat and humidity. Gasparilla Island was awesome, although sparsely populated. Did lots of pier fishing catching fish I have never seen ("greenbacks", what looked like yellow fin tuna, and I think a snapper or two), front flips off an abandoned pier, snorkeling with about 5' visibility, finding small black shark's teeth. Caught little crabs on Englewood Beach at night, that was a blast.

Accidentally had a 4' gator on the line in a retention channel behind our house, caught an alligator gar and a few catfish on hot dog from the same spot.

Drove a rental '09 Altima all week, put 2,900 miles on it in 7 days. Drove the entire 17 hour trip home and did 12 hours on the trip there.

Entire vacation split 6 ways with a 3 bd 2 bth home w/ inground pool an '09 Altima and an '09 Sable roughly $750 ea. will have total later.

Chatted to sixshooter Monday evening I think...? Cool dude, really nice. My phone got broken Tuesday morning and I'm still w/o one until Wednesday. SPF 50 kept me from getting sunburn, but also blocked any chance of getting even slightly tan, so I'm still a pale shade of white with a ridiculous "farmer tan."

You aren't supposed to drink it.:)

May have all been in my head. A guy was telling me how his mom got really sick just after using OFF and said she collapsed and seizured... moments later I was using it and within 10 minutes I felt really nauseated. IDK, I guess I'm a sissy. I felt bad for about 6 hours though.