How should a civilian properly address an officer?
 

My two closest neighbors are a retired US Marine colonel and an active US Marine captain. I have never served in the armed forces.

We’re all very good friends- to the level that on any given evening we’re all quite likely to be in one of the three garages drinking beer and optionally working on somebody’s car or motorcycle.

Despite this, I like to show a certain level of respect. I realize that it would be improper for me to salute anyone, but upon making first contact for the evening (and while handing over or receiving a cold beer) I will typically greet them either by rank “Good evening, colonel” or simply “Hello, sir” prior to shifting to our usual first-name basis.

Are either of these technically considered an “acceptable” form of address for a civilian speaking to an officer, or am I horribly violating a rule of protocol?

"wattup fucker" or "holla nigga"

^--- you owe me a new keyboard. lol.

Any etiqutte book should address this, If you can't find one online, any book store should have one you could leaf through briefly.

I am sure they appreciate the greeting. If they are embarrassed by it, they will ask you to stop.

if i was friends with someone with some sort of rank and i would treat them like any other friend.

If you are neighbors and friends why can't you call them by their first name?

obviously he can, but he wants to honor them by following etiquette. Kinda how I call my profs, "Professor so-and-so," even though in CA, people are pretty laid back. One time one of my profs responded by calling me Mr. Yamamoto. Very witty that professor is.

I was in the Army way back when...Officers were addressed as Sir, and women officers, needed to be addressed as Ma'am.

IIRC the Nav/Marines might be different though, but 'sir' is usually a safe bet...

Joe, I'm a Navy LT, the equivalent of a Marine Captain.
There is no requirement/suggestion/rule/reccomendation on how the average civilian should address a member of the Armed Forces in the context you describe that I know of. I can guarantee you that they notice, though. It shows a certain knowledge and level of awareness that the average guy might not have or care about. Your recognition of their position also elevates YOU in their estimate. However, like you said, one "Sir" per conversation is enough... a "Howdy Neighbor" and a firm handshake are just as effective. We're just regular Joes too. We wanna talk about neighbor shit like everybody does, the race, kids, lawncare, etc... Hell, I'm on this forum and I hope everybody recognizes how full of shit I am usually.

I have several Enlisted neighbors, two Chiefs and a couple senior Petty Officers. I've told them several times that I'm just Sam... they call me Sir anyways, even if I'm just out mowing the lawn. Two doors down is the XO of an aircraft carrier... I call him XO or Sir (just twice per conversation, usually as a hello and a goodbye). Even if he's out mowing the lawn.

As I was thinking about this, I asked myself what motivates a man to look at another with "respect". In the context of this thread, I don't think simply wearing a uniform alone would do it. Joe, those two guys probably did something more to impress you than just wear a uniform. You must have recognized them for good people.

Now, to caveat all this and ad to what I said above, don't get the idea that military officers are anything special. We've got more than our fair share of useless douche-bags just like the civilian world. There are 1st year Airmen I know that are worth more than a couple of the Commanders I've worked for. I guess in the end, judge a man by what you make of him... give him the respect he deserves based on that.

Very well said.

I've saluted many Naval pilots that I cursed under my breathe. But the fact remains they had a much more demanding task (landing an F14 on a moving fucking ship) then me (fix the engine systems). I've also gotten yelled at for NOT saluting when walking around the base for the simple fact I couldn't distinguish on Officer's gold pin in the sun compared to a Chief's pin,haha. That only happened once, in A-School.

Regarding the hand salute, it's not used indoors unless you are reporting for Orders or on Guard Duty, and most certainly not used in civilian clothes, unless you're the Prez-o-dent.

I got nothing else to add except kudos to you Joe for showing some kind of respect for our military, regardless of whether you agree with our Commander In Chief or not.

Sam, what do you do in the NAVY?

-AD1 TO

I am from the Submarine community and we just call them newbie when they first show up. j/k, but a lot of Nucs and the officers that come into the nuclear field are right there at the same age, so we end up calling each other by first names out in town and when just fucking around. But when we have a job to get done, we go back to the sir thing. When in a casual environment, I would just show them respect by allowing them to get away from the military life and just call them by their first names.

The key here is that you want to show some respect (obviously you do respect these two men) and that you don't feel some sort of strange obligation to do so. I think that it's perfectly acceptable to say "Good evening, sir or Captain" or a simple "Hello, Sir." If it's a problem, they will let you know... I think it's just good manners. You can really never go wrong with sir unless he's 25 years old and you're 70, in which case Captain would be more appropriate.

Just my 2 cents... No protocol being violated in my book.

Mark

just say "Hello friend that risks their ass and puts their tail on the line to defend our country, whether or not they believe in what they are risking their ass for" and then hand him a beer. I am sure he'd appreciate that, much more meaningful than "sir"

I would imagine that they would likely want to just be plain old Joe. I do have much respect for millitary personel, they do their thing so that I can do mine. I actually thanked one for doing his service and shook his hand and he smarted off to me. I was rather disapointed and am kinda gun shy now to do the same. I think it would be cool to throw a Sir in there or their rank as a kinda playin around/acknowledgement of their service. I guess I respect that they get out there and do it. There are duche bags everywhere but I still respect them for what they do for the country. And with the country so divided on the current issue the soldiers need all the support they can get from us on either side of the issue.

hahahahalol :gay:

I fly the plane in my avatar... well, actually I sit in the back and pedal real fast to make the frisbee on top go around.

you nub

Well if it's any help my neighbor would make an initial greeting of
"Hello there Colonel" to my retired neighbor before sitting with him.
The rest of the night he called him frank and enjoyed cheap dutch masters with boxed wine on ice

We call my grandfather Colonel...mostly because his legal first name is A....so Colonel sounds a bit better than A...

Non useful bitch, love it but we cannot use that term in the kinder, gentler navy.

you should call DirecTV and tell them they installed your dish upside down.

Ok I read about three posts and I've come to settle this discussion:

Officers in the military, while there are some good ones, I also know a bunch of douche bags (great terminology) that I have had the pleasure of meeting have gone military and simply gotten officer status because they graduated college (whether in 4 or 7 years). Them having a rank does not make them less of a douche.
Now I understand you have a great deal of respect for these individuals (they apparently must fall into the non-douche category, so my suggestion would be this:
They would respect you a great deal more, if instead of calling them Captain, you bought them a bottle of Captain (Morgan). Neighbors are neighbors either way, call them by their first name, get blitzed and invite them to a BBQ.

Also, my previous contract was at Veteran's Affairs, a mix of all branches retired military. If you want to really get in on their good side, and they are marines.. just complain about how the Air Force have it easy with all the golf courses on their bases and shit. Please find a picture below that my marine buddies love.

Leave the military to the military in most cases. Colonel is pretty high up though, anyone major and above I might address as such unless I'd ever had a beer with them, then it's open season. If they're going to be stuffy about it then I'll just demand that they call me reverend since I am ordained.

Call him sir if you want, but "us military folk" usually don't address each other by rank/lastname when we're out of uniform and off duty.

For example: My NCO at work is "sergeant (last name)"

after duty hours, he's "Tom"

One more thing: according to regulation, it is them who are required to address YOU as sir. Kudos for respecting them though. There are some nimrods out there who don't give two shits about the military.

Pretty cool. E-2C? Carrier-based?

I'm always impressed by the skill and balls it must take to land something that big on a moving carrier deck.

They usually do call me sir if they are younger than me. Which is hilarious.

The military always suffers politics, the media and idiots. It's unfortunate but it goes with the job and it isn't anything new. On the otherhand they are given a lot of oppurtunity in their lives. My cousin just retired after 20 years. He dropped out of high school but just got a job with the DOD making twice what I do. He paid his dues and was well rewarded. But actually, he never let the BS bother him, as far as he was concerned there was no place for politics in the military. Trust me when I say his time in the military was no picnic, he deserved what was coming to him, but it does show that if you do your job you'll be taken care of.

One last thought, I will say that I find hilarious the assholes in the military who'll say my opinion doesn't matter because I never served even though they were a cook, never left the U.S. or worked in an office building for their entire military career. Those idiots can kiss my ass.

You betcha! This is how we keep it real!
http://www.navy.mil/management/photo...-0555B-032.jpg

Landing.
http://www.navy.mil/management/photo...-1063M-003.jpg

This is what my seat looks like:
http://www.navy.mil/management/photo...-1407C-002.jpg

I don't know about THAT. For officers it's a little different but a Chief will be a Chief no matter what he is wearing, even a clown outfit. Same goes for "Gunnys". Even officers know that. It has to do with the great amount of respect the Chiefs get due to their time-in-service and "paying dues", they are also crazy mutherfuckers, especially the AOs (Aviation Ordinance). An officer, on the hand, can get the title right out of college, but you need a whole lot of stripes on your arm to get to Chief.

Koto, are you in the Army? If so, then you'll know that the Army in general has the reputation as being much more lax when it comes to stuff like this. Exhondaman is right. In the Navy, a Chief is "Chief" or "Senior" or "MasterChief", no matter what.

I played golf this afternoon at the base 9-hole course. We were a threesome of LT's. Another guy showed up and asked to join. He was a little older, but chewed the fat and talked shit just like we were. He told us his name and we played a nice round. On the last hole, he said he was in a little hurry and did we mind if he played ahead... I said "Sure thing, we'll catch you next time Sir." Hell, I call my Grandpaw sir... it's just something I've gotten used to saying. He looked at me "Aw hell son, it's just Tom out here... I'll catch you boys next time." As we were finishing up, I saw him walk out to his car...parked in the Flag Officers spot. Yup, 3-star General... or Tom on the golf course.

Most of the military just likes to get out of that life when they go home. It is almost like we live double lifes. My gf gets pissed because I don't talk about work when I get home because I don't want to. I leave that behind when I step off the "deckplates." Something that always makes me and most of my shipmates feel good, is to offer to buy us a few drinks. I never turn down drinks. Just maintain the current relationship that you have, and make it appearent that you respect him with a drink and a complement.

Looks like the Oscar Meyer Weiner Mobile with wings. :D

Mark

Gotta admit, that's how my time in the USAF was... On-duty was all business and off-duty I was a different person. Did someone see an AF base around here.

Very much a double life at the time. I have a feeling my time in the Navy will be a little different.

Mark

Ok, well. That generated a surprisingly large volume of information, some of it useful. :cool:

I guess a lot of folks mis-understood me. I'm not trying to be formal here, and believe me, many of you would be unable to comprehend the volume of alcohol that passes betwixt us neighbors on a regular basis.

I just wanted to make sure that the occasional "Afternoon, sir" spoken in a neighborly tone and with a handshake wasn't horribly violating some unwritten rue of protocol and secretly making me look like an ass.