Notices
Insert BS here A place to discuss anything you want

How should a civilian properly address an officer?

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
Old May 9, 2007 | 03:56 PM
  #1  
Joe Perez's Avatar
Thread Starter
Boost Pope
iTrader: (8)
 
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 34,402
Total Cats: 7,523
From: Chicago. (The less-murder part.)
Default How should a civilian properly address an officer?

My two closest neighbors are a retired US Marine colonel and an active US Marine captain. I have never served in the armed forces.

We’re all very good friends- to the level that on any given evening we’re all quite likely to be in one of the three garages drinking beer and optionally working on somebody’s car or motorcycle.

Despite this, I like to show a certain level of respect. I realize that it would be improper for me to salute anyone, but upon making first contact for the evening (and while handing over or receiving a cold beer) I will typically greet them either by rank “Good evening, colonel” or simply “Hello, sir” prior to shifting to our usual first-name basis.

Are either of these technically considered an “acceptable” form of address for a civilian speaking to an officer, or am I horribly violating a rule of protocol?
Old May 9, 2007 | 03:58 PM
  #2  
Braineack's Avatar
Boost Czar
iTrader: (62)
 
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 80,552
Total Cats: 4,368
From: Chantilly, VA
Default

"wattup ******" or "holla *****"
Old May 9, 2007 | 04:03 PM
  #3  
Trent's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (11)
 
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,651
Total Cats: 39
From: Louisiana
Default

^--- you owe me a new keyboard. lol.
Old May 9, 2007 | 04:03 PM
  #4  
nester's Avatar
Senior Member
iTrader: (6)
 
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 811
Total Cats: 0
From: Houston, TX
Default

Any etiqutte book should address this, If you can't find one online, any book store should have one you could leaf through briefly.
Old May 9, 2007 | 04:24 PM
  #5  
olderguy's Avatar
AFM Crusader
iTrader: (19)
 
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 4,716
Total Cats: 364
From: Wayne, NJ
Default

Originally Posted by Joe Perez
My two closest neighbors are a retired US Marine colonel and an active US Marine captain. I have never served in the armed forces.

We’re all very good friends- to the level that on any given evening we’re all quite likely to be in one of the three garages drinking beer and optionally working on somebody’s car or motorcycle.

Despite this, I like to show a certain level of respect. I realize that it would be improper for me to salute anyone, but upon making first contact for the evening (and while handing over or receiving a cold beer) I will typically greet them either by rank “Good evening, colonel” or simply “Hello, sir” prior to shifting to our usual first-name basis.

Are either of these technically considered an “acceptable” form of address for a civilian speaking to an officer, or am I horribly violating a rule of protocol?
I am sure they appreciate the greeting. If they are embarrassed by it, they will ask you to stop.
Old May 9, 2007 | 05:50 PM
  #6  
Mach929's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (3)
 
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 2,494
Total Cats: 0
From: lansdale PA
Default

if i was friends with someone with some sort of rank and i would treat them like any other friend.
Old May 9, 2007 | 06:01 PM
  #7  
neogenesis2004's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (12)
 
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 4,413
Total Cats: 20
Default

If you are neighbors and friends why can't you call them by their first name?
Old May 9, 2007 | 06:22 PM
  #8  
turbored's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 547
Total Cats: 0
From: San Francisco
Default

obviously he can, but he wants to honor them by following etiquette. Kinda how I call my profs, "Professor so-and-so," even though in CA, people are pretty laid back. One time one of my profs responded by calling me Mr. Yamamoto. Very witty that professor is.
Old May 9, 2007 | 06:38 PM
  #9  
Jefe's Avatar
Senior Member
iTrader: (7)
 
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 939
Total Cats: 0
From: VT
Default

I was in the Army way back when...Officers were addressed as Sir, and women officers, needed to be addressed as Ma'am.

IIRC the Nav/Marines might be different though, but 'sir' is usually a safe bet...

Last edited by Jefe; May 9, 2007 at 11:03 PM.
Old May 9, 2007 | 06:46 PM
  #10  
samnavy's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (7)
 
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,463
Total Cats: 327
From: VaBch, VA
Default

Joe, I'm a Navy LT, the equivalent of a Marine Captain.
There is no requirement/suggestion/rule/reccomendation on how the average civilian should address a member of the Armed Forces in the context you describe that I know of. I can guarantee you that they notice, though. It shows a certain knowledge and level of awareness that the average guy might not have or care about. Your recognition of their position also elevates YOU in their estimate. However, like you said, one "Sir" per conversation is enough... a "Howdy Neighbor" and a firm handshake are just as effective. We're just regular Joes too. We wanna talk about neighbor **** like everybody does, the race, kids, lawncare, etc... Hell, I'm on this forum and I hope everybody recognizes how full of **** I am usually.

I have several Enlisted neighbors, two Chiefs and a couple senior Petty Officers. I've told them several times that I'm just Sam... they call me Sir anyways, even if I'm just out mowing the lawn. Two doors down is the XO of an aircraft carrier... I call him XO or Sir (just twice per conversation, usually as a hello and a goodbye). Even if he's out mowing the lawn.

As I was thinking about this, I asked myself what motivates a man to look at another with "respect". In the context of this thread, I don't think simply wearing a uniform alone would do it. Joe, those two guys probably did something more to impress you than just wear a uniform. You must have recognized them for good people.

Now, to caveat all this and ad to what I said above, don't get the idea that military officers are anything special. We've got more than our fair share of useless douche-bags just like the civilian world. There are 1st year Airmen I know that are worth more than a couple of the Commanders I've worked for. I guess in the end, judge a man by what you make of him... give him the respect he deserves based on that.
Old May 9, 2007 | 07:11 PM
  #11  
Exhondaman's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 283
Total Cats: 1
From: SoCal
Default

As I was thinking about this, I asked myself what motivates a man to look at another with "respect". In the context of this thread, I don't think simply wearing a uniform alone would do it. Joe, those two guys probably did something more to impress you than just wear a uniform. You must have recognized them for good people.
Very well said.

I've saluted many Naval pilots that I cursed under my breathe. But the fact remains they had a much more demanding task (landing an F14 on a moving ******* ship) then me (fix the engine systems). I've also gotten yelled at for NOT saluting when walking around the base for the simple fact I couldn't distinguish on Officer's gold pin in the sun compared to a Chief's pin,haha. That only happened once, in A-School.

Regarding the hand salute, it's not used indoors unless you are reporting for Orders or on Guard Duty, and most certainly not used in civilian clothes, unless you're the Prez-o-dent.

I got nothing else to add except kudos to you Joe for showing some kind of respect for our military, regardless of whether you agree with our Commander In Chief or not.

Sam, what do you do in the NAVY?

-AD1 TO
Old May 9, 2007 | 07:12 PM
  #12  
boostinsteve's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 563
Total Cats: 0
From: Honolulu, HI
Default

Originally Posted by samnavy
Joe, I'm a Navy LT, the equivalent of a Marine Captain.
There is no requirement/suggestion/rule/reccomendation on how the average civilian should address a member of the Armed Forces in the context you describe that I know of. I can guarantee you that they notice, though. It shows a certain knowledge and level of awareness that the average guy might not have or care about. Your recognition of their position also elevates YOU in their estimate. However, like you said, one "Sir" per conversation is enough... a "Howdy Neighbor" and a firm handshake are just as effective. We're just regular Joes too. We wanna talk about neighbor **** like everybody does, the race, kids, lawncare, etc... Hell, I'm on this forum and I hope everybody recognizes how full of **** I am usually.

I have several Enlisted neighbors, two Chiefs and a couple senior Petty Officers. I've told them several times that I'm just Sam... they call me Sir anyways, even if I'm just out mowing the lawn. Two doors down is the XO of an aircraft carrier... I call him XO or Sir (just twice per conversation, usually as a hello and a goodbye). Even if he's out mowing the lawn.

As I was thinking about this, I asked myself what motivates a man to look at another with "respect". In the context of this thread, I don't think simply wearing a uniform alone would do it. Joe, those two guys probably did something more to impress you than just wear a uniform. You must have recognized them for good people.

Now, to caveat all this and ad to what I said above, don't get the idea that military officers are anything special. We've got more than our fair share of useless douche-bags just like the civilian world. There are 1st year Airmen I know that are worth more than a couple of the Commanders I've worked for. I guess in the end, judge a man by what you make of him... give him the respect he deserves based on that.
I am from the Submarine community and we just call them newbie when they first show up. j/k, but a lot of Nucs and the officers that come into the nuclear field are right there at the same age, so we end up calling each other by first names out in town and when just ******* around. But when we have a job to get done, we go back to the sir thing. When in a casual environment, I would just show them respect by allowing them to get away from the military life and just call them by their first names.
Old May 9, 2007 | 07:14 PM
  #13  
Markp's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 1,380
Total Cats: 2
Default

Originally Posted by Joe Perez

Despite this, I like to show a certain level of respect. I realize that it would be improper for me to salute anyone, but upon making first contact for the evening (and while handing over or receiving a cold beer) I will typically greet them either by rank “Good evening, colonel” or simply “Hello, sir” prior to shifting to our usual first-name basis.

Are either of these technically considered an “acceptable” form of address for a civilian speaking to an officer, or am I horribly violating a rule of protocol?
The key here is that you want to show some respect (obviously you do respect these two men) and that you don't feel some sort of strange obligation to do so. I think that it's perfectly acceptable to say "Good evening, sir or Captain" or a simple "Hello, Sir." If it's a problem, they will let you know... I think it's just good manners. You can really never go wrong with sir unless he's 25 years old and you're 70, in which case Captain would be more appropriate.

Just my 2 cents... No protocol being violated in my book.

Mark
Old May 9, 2007 | 07:43 PM
  #14  
savior's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 215
Total Cats: 0
Default

just say "Hello friend that risks their *** and puts their tail on the line to defend our country, whether or not they believe in what they are risking their *** for" and then hand him a beer. I am sure he'd appreciate that, much more meaningful than "sir"
Old May 9, 2007 | 09:06 PM
  #15  
Strider's Avatar
Junior Member
iTrader: (3)
 
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 163
Total Cats: 0
From: St Louis Park MN
Default

I would imagine that they would likely want to just be plain old Joe. I do have much respect for millitary personel, they do their thing so that I can do mine. I actually thanked one for doing his service and shook his hand and he smarted off to me. I was rather disapointed and am kinda gun shy now to do the same. I think it would be cool to throw a Sir in there or their rank as a kinda playin around/acknowledgement of their service. I guess I respect that they get out there and do it. There are ***** bags everywhere but I still respect them for what they do for the country. And with the country so divided on the current issue the soldiers need all the support they can get from us on either side of the issue.
Old May 9, 2007 | 09:55 PM
  #16  
Pitlab77's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (3)
 
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,914
Total Cats: 5
From: Houston
Default

Originally Posted by Braineack
"wattup ******" or "holla *****"
hahahahalol :gay:
Old May 9, 2007 | 10:43 PM
  #17  
samnavy's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (7)
 
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,463
Total Cats: 327
From: VaBch, VA
Default

Originally Posted by Exhondaman
Sam, what do you do in the NAVY?
-AD1 TO
I fly the plane in my avatar... well, actually I sit in the back and pedal real fast to make the frisbee on top go around.
Old May 10, 2007 | 01:11 AM
  #18  
savior's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 215
Total Cats: 0
Default

you nub
Old May 10, 2007 | 01:50 AM
  #19  
ST2udent's Avatar
Junior Member
iTrader: (1)
 
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 143
Total Cats: 0
Default

Well if it's any help my neighbor would make an initial greeting of
"Hello there Colonel" to my retired neighbor before sitting with him.
The rest of the night he called him frank and enjoyed cheap dutch masters with boxed wine on ice
Old May 10, 2007 | 02:37 AM
  #20  
miatamania's Avatar
Elite Member
iTrader: (9)
 
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 4,160
Total Cats: 6
From: Concord, North Carolina
Default

We call my grandfather Colonel...mostly because his legal first name is A....so Colonel sounds a bit better than A...



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:20 PM.