Soooooo I grabbed a bite to eat with a friend then while sitting outside we were questioned by police at 10:30am on a Sunday morning. I talked to the "good cop" because they were surrounding a building with dark tinted windows because someone was allegedly seen masturbating inside. Then the bad cop arrives:
what is your name?
why are you here?
you gf's gym is on the other side of campus though...
how did you get here?
where are you going?
where do you work?
were you in that building today? What if I said you matched the description of someone seen exposing themselves? Why don't you step over here and see if this witness can ID you...if not you can go home.
I refused outright...considering the description was a "man in a white shirt and baseball cap." I explained to the cop that I thought the description was pretty "loose" and that I doubted that any face could be ID'd through dark tinted windows on the 2nd floor of a building. I didn't think the cards were in my favor...its a good thing too.

Then I sat on the same bench, ate my sandwich, and watched the cops grab several men and pull them aside, sometimes pulling them out of the restaurant where they were eating with friends...and pull the same bullshit until the witness finally decided she had a match who happened to be a guy in a white t-shirt with a black baseball cap who she saw 20-30' away in a 2nd story TINTED window.

**** is scary, son. I've never been that close to getting my life ruined from being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

 

I would have gone to the witness and dropped my pants. Look familiar? No, didn't think so, bitch! Fortunately I have only had one or two bad experiences with the "bad cop", which he was trying to put my *** in jail that night for something, gun charge, evading, something. None of which he could pin on me.

 

 

Glad to hear that you got away.

 

What a bitch..going all the way tot he 2nd floor to beat off in the window. I thought you were man enough to do that **** right there on the bench in broad daylight Hustler.

 

Thank god for the tint on the building or you would have been pee-wee busted.

 

fwiw, you have to answer your name and address. That's federal law.


Also isn't peeping illegal? and masturbating inside your own home legal?

 

yes, and yes - but as far as i can tell - this was at a college or something (word "campus" led me to believe so)

 

I will next time to show all you bitches how manly I am.

 

C====3

 

I told those ***** a thousand times that I don't jerk on Shabbos!

 

Eyewitnesses are horribly inaccurate statistically but are often the only evidence. They are considered golden by police and prosecutors though they know the facts too.

 

Could've at least done it behind an untinted window.

 

get the **** out ->

 

OP you're gay.

 

PM me your number. I need a slave to lap up my golden nectar. I'll start with your mouth, and finish with your dignity.

 

That's not hustlers style, I'd imagine it's a bit more like this:

 

Big Lebowski ftw !