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Old 03-04-2012, 01:36 AM   #21
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The other day I was driving to work in my miata. I was at a red light and I noticed the minivan behind me had a big assed airfreshener hanging from the rear view mirror that looked like a hand giving the middle finger. I laughed, cause the driver looked like a huge bag of douche.
5 minutes later I pull into work.
9 hours and 10 minutes later, I leave the work parking lot. The time is just after 11PM.
I am on this road which has many straights, it's 2 lanes, speed limit is 45mph, and it's dark out. This pair of headlights comes out of nowhere and is UP MY ***. This pisses me off, and I'm in my Miata which pisses me off more that somebody is UP MY ***. I don't want to increase right foot pedal pressure, because I've seen a lot of deer on this road, and I really don't feel like totalling my car against one, just because I want to evade some ***-hat. Instead I just continue to do the speed limit until we hit the 90 degree turns that are marked 15mph. I go like 45-55 through these turns, and rear view jerkoff can't seem to keep up. Now it's back to straights where monkey spank rides my *** until we make a right turn on RT. 61 which is 4 lanes of highway. Douche nugget immediately gets in the left lane and passes me. Then I see it. It's the same minivan that was behind me on the way to work with the middle finger air freshener, but wait; he also has a middle finger bumper sticker on the back on his soccer taxi! Then it hits me. "If you were a cop and you pulled this guy over and the first thing you saw was that bumper sticker, would you give him a warning? Neither would I."
I pull up next to him and blow off to attempt to egg him on. This guy thinks I seriously want to race him! He floors it and pulls away while I smirk. I pull up and blow off again, and he floors it again and pulls away. Why am I doing this? Because 2 miles ahead the speed limit tapers down to 45, and I am praying that tonight the usual cop that hides in the Chrysler dealer parking lot is waiting. We come down the hill towards the dealership and I pull up next to the guy and blow off again. He hammers his pedal down again, and I see the orange glow of the Crown Vic's marker lights while it's parked right next to a brand new Challenger. Middle finger minivan passes by the cop doing easily 70 in a 45 while I already slowed to 45 and went in the passing lane a 1/4 mile ago. The cop pulls out next to me, and passes me in the right lane like he's on a mission. By now the van is easily 1/2 mile ahead of us and is picking up speed as the 45mph zone ended. The cop throws on his lights and he pulls the van over about a mile down the road.
I hope that ball bag got a HUGE ticket. I also hope he hit a deer and totalled his van on his way home after getting that ticket.
Either way I laughed all the way home.
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Old 03-04-2012, 02:58 PM   #22
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^^^^^ haha nice!!!

I've come to the conclusion that the majority of people are bad drivers. Its just how it is. Sure there's plenty of people on the roads that probably feel the same exact way I or you do, but unfortunately the number of idiots on the road outweighs us.

I'm ALWAYS watching the other guy. I'm in my lane, not causing anyone any harm, mostly keeping to myself. Just do me a favor and stay the ---- out of my way is really all I ask. Don't block me from passing, don't tailgate me, don't ride close to me in the lane next to me and most importantly don't ---- with me.

Not just in the miata, but in an assortment of vehicles I've gotten out of the car. I've turned around and chased people down, I've gone after the car with the intention of damaging it, I've told people to get the ---- out of the car, etc etc. In the moment there's hardly anyone that can stop me, but yes I know its dangerous to be that way. I'm probably pretty lucky I haven't been shot or stabbed yet.

I'm never the aggressor though, its always someone else that ***** with me either unintentionally or obviously on purpose. Either way, I can only keep my cool for so long before I've had enough. I probably should just pull over and let them pass, or let it go and just enjoy my day, but like I said in the moment I rage up. The past couple years I've been better though. Staying away from bars and going out late all night helps. lol
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Old 03-04-2012, 03:06 PM   #23
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Quote:
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UP MY ***.
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Old 03-05-2012, 03:07 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thirdgen View Post
The other day I was driving to work in my miata. I was at a red light and I noticed the minivan behind me had a big assed airfreshener hanging from the rear view mirror that looked like a hand giving the middle finger. I laughed, cause the driver looked like a huge bag of douche.
5 minutes later I pull into work.
9 hours and 10 minutes later, I leave the work parking lot. The time is just after 11PM.
I am on this road which has many straights, it's 2 lanes, speed limit is 45mph, and it's dark out. This pair of headlights comes out of nowhere and is UP MY ***. This pisses me off, and I'm in my Miata which pisses me off more that somebody is UP MY ***. I don't want to increase right foot pedal pressure, because I've seen a lot of deer on this road, and I really don't feel like totalling my car against one, just because I want to evade some ***-hat. Instead I just continue to do the speed limit until we hit the 90 degree turns that are marked 15mph. I go like 45-55 through these turns, and rear view jerkoff can't seem to keep up. Now it's back to straights where monkey spank rides my *** until we make a right turn on RT. 61 which is 4 lanes of highway. Douche nugget immediately gets in the left lane and passes me. Then I see it. It's the same minivan that was behind me on the way to work with the middle finger air freshener, but wait; he also has a middle finger bumper sticker on the back on his soccer taxi! Then it hits me. "If you were a cop and you pulled this guy over and the first thing you saw was that bumper sticker, would you give him a warning? Neither would I."
I pull up next to him and blow off to attempt to egg him on. This guy thinks I seriously want to race him! He floors it and pulls away while I smirk. I pull up and blow off again, and he floors it again and pulls away. Why am I doing this? Because 2 miles ahead the speed limit tapers down to 45, and I am praying that tonight the usual cop that hides in the Chrysler dealer parking lot is waiting. We come down the hill towards the dealership and I pull up next to the guy and blow off again. He hammers his pedal down again, and I see the orange glow of the Crown Vic's marker lights while it's parked right next to a brand new Challenger. Middle finger minivan passes by the cop doing easily 70 in a 45 while I already slowed to 45 and went in the passing lane a 1/4 mile ago. The cop pulls out next to me, and passes me in the right lane like he's on a mission. By now the van is easily 1/2 mile ahead of us and is picking up speed as the 45mph zone ended. The cop throws on his lights and he pulls the van over about a mile down the road.
I hope that ball bag got a HUGE ticket. I also hope he hit a deer and totalled his van on his way home after getting that ticket.
Either way I laughed all the way home.
I've done similar things to two seperate BMW drivers and both proceeded to get pulled over. It's an epic feeling- knowing where the cops sit and taunting douchebags before getting to the known hotspots is




My thing I hate more than tailgaters are the masses of selfish dickbags who think it looks cool and is a good idea to put HID lighting in standard headlights and proceed to blind everone. It really sucks that cops don't crack down on this either. I swear I am going to resort to getting one of those insane blue or green laser pointers and aiming them at the driver's face for having blue/purple/pink HIDs in their sh!tty cars with sh!tty reflector housings. Just a quick burst so they will hav less of a chance at knowing where it came from.
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Old 03-05-2012, 04:33 PM   #25
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