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Old 01-25-2010, 06:30 AM   #1
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Default So my step-mom went...

Into cardiac arrest. Not sure what happened. My Dad told me he was in his home office and had seen her around 5pm yesterday. He said he came downstairs around 530pm to get a drink and she was just slumped over a chair completely unresponsive, no pulse, and cold. The paramedics were able to bring her back after much work and rush her to the hospital. Now she is in ICU with no brain activity. Tonight about 2 hours ago they were supposed to bring her out of that hypothermia suit or whatever it is called that lowers their body temperature.

So they said a couple of things could happen

She could reject living on her on and die.
She could reject living on her own and have repeated strokes.
She could takeover her bodily functions again but possibly be a vegetable forever.

That's pretty much what the doc is saying. I've done some quick research from webmd and it isn't looking so good as far as numbers and chances here. Even if she does come back, will she have severe brain damage from being dead for god knows how long? The hardest part of all this is seeing my Dad so miserable. The other thing is I can't go down to Houston to visit because the girlfriend is due any day now.
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Old 01-25-2010, 08:55 AM   #2
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Wow, that sucks. You've got a lot of stuff going on right now and I really feel for you.

My prayers go out to your step mom, father and family. Good luck with the baby, too.
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Old 01-25-2010, 09:07 AM   #3
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Damn, that is terrible. Best of luck with her and the girlfriend/kid. I hope everything works out.
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Old 01-25-2010, 10:34 AM   #4
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I've been there and I know this sucks, badly. Hope it works out for you and your family. All the best
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Old 01-25-2010, 12:05 PM   #5
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You are in my prayers.
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Old 01-25-2010, 12:41 PM   #6
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I'm very sorry to hear.

I understand this has to be tough, especially at such a delicate time for you guys.

Try and get your dad as involved as possible with the little one, as he's surely going to need some emotional motivation.

Will be praying for all five of you.
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Old 01-25-2010, 01:51 PM   #7
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All the best. Hope she pulls through for you. :(
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Old 01-25-2010, 04:48 PM   #8
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Well a little update. They let her body temperature rise and so far so good. No strokes or seizures or anything of that nature. They say her organs are all running well the only thing now is the brain. They are still a little worried about brain activity since there hasn't been much but honestly only time will tell.
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Old 01-25-2010, 05:41 PM   #9
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I think your girlfriend would understand that your dad needs you right now. If she didn't and she was my girlfriend, then she would no longer be my girlfriend. This will be a good judge of your girlfriends character.

I hope your step mom makes it through. The body can do some pretty amazing things. Maybe her body and pulse were so low because the body started to shut down to preserve the brain.
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Old 01-25-2010, 06:02 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by djp0623 View Post
I think your girlfriend would understand that your dad needs you right now. If she didn't and she was my girlfriend, then she would no longer be my girlfriend. This will be a good judge of your girlfriends character.

I hope your step mom makes it through. The body can do some pretty amazing things. Maybe her body and pulse were so low because the body started to shut down to preserve the brain.
Mmm, not such an easy decision. She's pregnant and due soon. What if he were to miss the birth of the baby? It can be traumatizing for a young mother. Just b/c it's seems like a simple decision for us guys, doesn't mean that it's straightforward.
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Old 01-25-2010, 06:07 PM   #11
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Ahhh, I didn't realize she was more than "just a girlfriend" I would say take her with you, but that would be too stressful of an environment for a pregnant woman imo.
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Old 01-25-2010, 06:13 PM   #12
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Ahhh, I didn't realize she was more than "just a girlfriend" I would say take her with you, but that would be too stressful of an environment for a pregnant woman imo.
"the girlfriend is due any day now."

Sorry to hear about this. Hope everything turns out as well as possible.
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Old 01-26-2010, 12:11 PM   #13
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Ahhh, I didn't realize she was more than "just a girlfriend" I would say take her with you, but that would be too stressful of an environment for a pregnant woman imo.
Well, not to mention that she might not be able to travel for long distances either. I think after a certain x-mester (maybe 2nd?) they don't recommend flight travel. Not to mention having to pee all the time (the baby takes up a lot of room the bladder used to take for granted), aches, sore back, swollen cankles, nausea, who-knows-what-else.

It's a tough spot to be in: supportive to your Dad and step-mom vs baby's momma. Even if you knew for a fact that you could safely get away for 48 hours to comfort your Dad, it's still pretty nerve-wracking.
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Old 01-30-2010, 04:17 AM   #14
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Well, I thought I would update this thread, for whatever it is worth. My Dad, my step-mom's Dad, and some top doctors all met this afternoon to discuss what happens next. The news isn't very good. As of yet there has been no brain activity. All the tests they have done have revealed nothing but a vegetable. The machines are making her hearth pump and her lungs breath. They pretty much put it that she died a few days ago and has been since.

I guess the amount of time that she was "dead" was enough time to drain the amount of oxygen needed to keep the brain going. My Dad said he is going to start making "plans" for her...well...departure. Currently my whole family is down there in Houston with him, I just feel like **** because I can't be because of the baby. I even had to miss work tonight because she started leaking and her contractions were getting close(10 mins consistent). So there is no way in hell I'll be able to leave for a period of time. This is getting really stressful!!!!
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Old 01-30-2010, 04:34 AM   #15
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Sorry to hear. At least you and your family has a new baby to look forward to in this tough situation. Maybe grandpa and yourself can find some comfort in that.
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Old 01-30-2010, 05:08 PM   #16
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You are doing the right thing. Your father is taking care of his responsibility and you are taking care yours.

The only thing more helpless than a woman giving birth is a newborn baby. You are where you belong, and where you are needed most. You are responsible for them now.

I hope congratulations will be in order by the time you read this.
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Old 01-30-2010, 09:18 PM   #17
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+1 ^ You guys will be in my thoughts, hope everything is working itself out as smooth as possible...
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Old 02-01-2010, 12:24 AM   #18
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Looks like she passed away. Strangely enough while I was on the phone with my Dad. They took her off of life support earlier today but she didn't pass immediately. When I talked to him it was around 5-5.5 hours later. During the call, the flat line went off in the background and he said he had to go something happened. I just got home from work and it looks like her daughter posted on Facebook that her mom just passed. This really sucks. My Dad wants me to come Saturday for a celebration of her life but this couldn't be the worst possible timing.
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Old 02-01-2010, 10:10 AM   #19
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No bouncing baby yet?

If your girlfriend has the baby soon, you should be OK for a day trip by Saturday. And I assume her mother would be coming to stay with her to help out for a couple of weeks like most good mothers do. By the time several days have passed, the new mom should be regaining her strength well enough for you to go to the memorial.

You should go if baby and mom are healthy.
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Old 02-01-2010, 02:11 PM   #20
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Oh boy...what a predicament. I hope your girlfriend will be understanding if you went (and the baby wasn't delivered yet).

I'm sure your father would be understanding if you were to meet up as soon as you could (perhaps a couple days after the birth?). It would suck to miss the memorial, but as a new father, I'm sure he'd understand your timing issues as well.
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