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Old 11-08-2015, 07:51 PM   #26281
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^^ Modern crime



How about some smart bird activity:




He Thought This Bird Was Just Eating A Piece Of Bread, But Instead? Wow. NOVEMBER 5, 2015

Crows are among the smartest birds, let alone animals, in the world. In fact, scientists have found they're at least as smart as a seven-year-old human. So it shouldn't come as a shock when they find ways to show off their intelligence.

Yet when Oren Hasson was sitting by a pond in Ramat Gan, Israel, he didn't know any of this. Instead, he simply saw a crow fly over to the middle of the pond with a piece of bread in his mouth. What he captured the crow brilliantly doing, though, left him in shock!

Believe it or not, Hasson would eventually see more than ten crows accomplishing the same feat: placing bits of bread into the water, moving them around before they floated away, and capturing fish with the soggy bait. If that's not the ultimate display of animal intelligence, we don't know what is!
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Old 11-08-2015, 10:27 PM   #26282
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Picked up the stickers linked a few pages back. And a couple american flags.


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Old 11-09-2015, 09:38 AM   #26283
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Originally Posted by Erat View Post
I need a girlfriend. This is how i spend my Saturday nights...

Winterizing device for sprinkler system - YouTube

An idea i bogarted off AvE, except my version is WAY more simple.



press handle, count to 4, release.
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Old 11-09-2015, 10:26 AM   #26284
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press handle, count to 4, release.
I have 6 zones, I bled each zone for 10 minutes.

Only a fool would do it manually. Plus I have $0 into the tool.
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Old 11-09-2015, 10:35 AM   #26285
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The Random Pictures Thread. Only Rule: Post here more and entertain me.-image.jpg
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Old 11-09-2015, 11:55 AM   #26286
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Originally Posted by Joe Perez View Post
Someone is randomly mailing extortion notices to restaurants all over the country, threatening them with all sorts of fallout (from bad Yelp reviews to false reports of illegal labor practices, drug-running, and harboring terrorists) unless the restaurant pays a "tribute" of Ƀ1.

It's despicable and brilliant. 1 bitcoin is just small enough to be worth paying to avoid the hassle, and yet large enough to be worthwhile to whoever is doing the blackmailing. Even if you only get a 10% response rate, that's still ~$370 in for $4.80 in postage; an 8,000% ROI. And there are a *lot* of small restaurants in the US.

People Are Sending Pizzerias Around the Country Extortion Letters Demanding Bitcoin -- Grub Street
At the time of this reply, Ƀ1 = $384.88 US according to the coindesk.com/price/ index.

Assuming you waited till the absolute last minute on August 14 of 2014 (because August 15 2014 is the due date on the notice) to convert, Ƀ1 = $496.38 US. Same source as above. If you bought in on August 1 2014 you'd be screwed as Ƀ1 was around $600.

So... where did you get the $370~ for 10% on $4.80 invested? Its starting to sound like new math, or I completely missed something.

Also, Dogecoin is obviously the superior cryptocurrency.

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Old 11-09-2015, 12:03 PM   #26287
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Originally Posted by EO2K View Post
So... where did you get the $370~ for 10% on $4.80 invested?
I just looked up the spot price on the day I posted that. It's called being lazy.

If you send out 10 extortion notices, and only one of the victims pays it, then assuming you received the bitcoin (and converted it to $US) yesterday, and assuming that a first-class stamp costs $0.48, you got roughly an 8,000% ROI.


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Old 11-09-2015, 12:11 PM   #26288
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EO2K View Post
At the time of this reply, Ƀ1 = $384.88 US according to the coindesk.com/price/ index.

Assuming you waited till the absolute last minute on August 14 of 2014 (because August 15 2014 is the due date on the notice) to convert, Ƀ1 = $496.38 US. Same source as above. If you bought in on August 1 2014 you'd be screwed as Ƀ1 was around $600.

So... where did you get the $370~ for 10% on $4.80 invested? Its starting to sound like new math, or I completely missed something.

Also, Dogecoin is obviously the superior cryptocurrency.

49 cents for first class postage * 10 letters is $4.80
1 Bitcoin on august 14 2014 was $496.38. Once the federal extortion tax is taken out and the state extort permits are granted, the total amortized income is exactly approximately $370.

So at 10% response rate, sending 10 letters at 49 cents each costs $4.80 and nets a total return of exactly nearly $370.



edit: forgot picture thread
edit2: because SFW
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Old 11-09-2015, 01:41 PM   #26289
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Once the federal extortion tax is taken out
What code do your enter on Line B of Schedule C?
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Old 11-09-2015, 05:48 PM   #26290
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Old 11-09-2015, 08:00 PM   #26291
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Old 11-09-2015, 08:05 PM   #26292
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Actually, I just thought of something.

Suppose that you are in the extortion business. And suppose that you declare all of your income from extorting, and suppose that on IRS Form 1040 Schedule C Line A (Principal business or profession, including product or service), you disclose that your primary business function is "extortion," and you pay your taxes in full.

Subsequent to your criminal conviction, you could claim that, by cashing your check, the IRS has become an accessory to your crime.
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Old 11-09-2015, 09:40 PM   #26293
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Old 11-09-2015, 09:51 PM   #26294
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe Perez View Post
Actually, I just thought of something.

Suppose that you are in the extortion business. And suppose that you declare all of your income from extorting, and suppose that on IRS Form 1040 Schedule C Line A (Principal business or profession, including product or service), you disclose that your primary business function is "extortion," and you pay your taxes in full.

Subsequent to your criminal conviction, you could claim that, by cashing your check, the IRS has become an accessory to your crime.
If I bought a illegal drug tax stamp from the state, wouldn't that kind of imply the same thing? The state is well aware of what they are receiving money for, but they'll still take it.



tax stamp drugs | eBay



Ernest, you dope fiend!
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Old 11-09-2015, 10:45 PM   #26296
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe Perez View Post
Actually, I just thought of something.

Suppose that you are in the extortion business. And suppose that you declare all of your income from extorting, and suppose that on IRS Form 1040 Schedule C Line A (Principal business or profession, including product or service), you disclose that your primary business function is "extortion," and you pay your taxes in full.

Subsequent to your criminal conviction, you could claim that, by cashing your check, the IRS has become an accessory to your crime.
False.
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Old 11-09-2015, 11:10 PM   #26297
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Ooh, I finally get to use this image!


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Old 11-09-2015, 11:43 PM   #26298
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False.
How is it false? You can claim that the Girl Scouts are pawns in a conspiracy led by the Federal Reserve Bank to sap and impurify all of your precious bodily fluids if you want.



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Old 11-10-2015, 12:05 AM   #26299
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Sometimes, you just gotta make a cake on the subway, and then share it with everyone.

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Old 11-10-2015, 12:28 AM   #26300
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Sometimes, you just gotta make a cake on the subway, and then share it with everyone.
It always amazes that people are willing to eat pretty much anything if they don't have to pay for it. There are studies that have shown that people that just ate a full meal will continue eating another meal if it's offered to them for free.

I stay the hell away from free food from strangers.
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