Ohh......should drinking games stop when you get older? lol

nah, you's just supposed to evolve

ayo respond to my e-mail, dawg

Drunk again. I dont normally get emotional or sad but now I am. Why?? Girlfriend has totally changed and is going down wrong path, and hanging out with wrong people. What do? Just move on? But I still care.. blarggh more drunk

sounds like you have a case of being a bitch.

you really need to meet another girl.

why I such bitch? thats the problem. ive stuffed 2 holes since then. no better. stop being bitch bitch bitch

mybe should I just kill her? eat her face florida style or something?

send her on a date with pusha. you wont want her back.

post pics so we can evaluate whether or not your feelings are warranted

Is she a blonde? They are such -----s

Oh, I can't say wh0res now either? ---- this ----

gay

fag

------

----

dick

---- anus penis vagina ----- ---- clit clitoris clitoral frenulum speculum ass butt tooshie douche intercourse ------- ---- sex secks

Only decent pics are ban noodz

Why am i sdeeing fours cars wide during the rolex race noe?>>? road americxa is pereety cool;... checys sucks, go mazdas

^needs to practice beering

Here is my predictions for tonight into tomorrow morning for myself:

omg I need to watch that entire show again

I'm getting old. Saturday I drank a lot, drove home and then had a headache for whole Sunday.

So basically my body can digest a metric ton of poison alcohol but my brain doesn't cooperate.

welcome to my world

Anyone else get the type of hangover that makes them not want to eat or drink anything, just sit in the fetal position and breathe heavily?

I get the feeling where i feel dehydrated yet the stomach feels bloated up.

----, nothing like sobering whiskey shits in a bar I dont know in some damn place in this stupid city.

I'll tell you drunk bastards a joke. (2nd time i'm writing this ----... page reloaded and erased everything the 1st time after i was nearly done :facepalm:)

So this dude meets this chick in the bar. Gorgeous chick blah blah. They share few drinks. One thing leads to another and she invites him over. When they enter her apartment she shows him around. This door is for the living room, this is for the bedroom, this is the bathroom... she goes "i'll take a quick shower, i'll be back in few mins, you can go wait in the living room for me. Watch some tv or something." Dude goes "Sure np."

She goes in the shower. The dude opens the living room door, turns the lights on to find a giant dog sitting on the couch. He quickly turns the lights off and closes the door. 10 minutes later the dude is still sitting in the hallway the chick is still in the shower.

After a whole night of drinking cranberry and vodka drinks, the dude feels like hes gotta take a dump. Sits there and waits, 10 minutes.. the chick is still in the shower. 10 minutes later.. no luck shes still showering. Waits another 10 minutes and is about to ---- his pants the chick is still in the shower. Looks around the other rooms, nope no bathroom so he comes up with a plan. I'll take a crap and say the dog took a crap. He goes in the living room, doesn't turn on the lights or anything. He squats next to the couch and takes his dump. All relaxed he goes back in the hallway.

Finally another 20 minutes pass and the chick comes out of the shower. She sees him sitting on the hallway floor and goes. Why are you out here? He goes "I saw the dog and didn't want to scare it." She goes. "Oh don't worry it's just a plush dog."

Further proof that dudes who drink cranberry vodka never get laid

All you realy need to know is first line to bar tender
"what kind of alcohol is that Absinthe?"

I've officially hit rock bottom:

https://www.miataturbo.net/attachmen...ine=1344088730

yes, that is menstrual blood

Aww, pushy is a big girl now

remember to rinse with cold water to get it out. hot water will cook it in.

bro those are her sheets, I don't care

at least she started.

Nice

:bowrofl:

I. Am. Drunk.

And gay, fuxk you

This is crazy.
I just met you.
But here's my number.
Call me maybe.

^virgin

I'd lick it. :giggle:



Oh, and since i'm drunk I tried using a dremel with a wire bruch at 8,ooorpm to remove my callouses, it worked awesome. :loser:

You would lick the shed, bloody lining of a uterus that was excreted from a vagina during vigorous, unprotected sexual intercourse?

Why not? I wouldn't lick it after you'd been there, but if I did the deed, I'd clean her ----- off.

Man this forum has some very unusual people.

I've licked some questionable puss in my day but goddamn

ill never forget my first taste of accidental iron consumption... if you know what I mean...

You've never licked a butthole pushy? I thought you were some sort of sex-god.

I've eaten a chick's ass before but it was showerplay

whew... I was starting to think you were a missionary-only-for-procreation kinda guy.



@ triple88a - It's just blood, brah. And it's from one of my favorite holes. :party:

I really enjoy missionary.

on this date many years ago, I lost my virginity to a 5'4" 105 lb chick with c cup titties and a fat ass. She now has a kid with another dude so I guess I lucked out.

You keep a diary?

Nah we hooked up at my buddy's birthday party and today is his birthday so...

Skimming through the thread, drinking with the wife, watching Dexter, she looks over as the bloody sheet goes by. I get the WTF? question. I answer , "Everyone needs their redwings".

I'll kiss a chick after a BJ, cool with a sex swing, had an ex that was an inch from midget, another that was a wet dream in daylight, and would sell a nut for toy money.

wat? Yay vodka

I was going to say something, but I forgot.

Oh wait. You know that satfsying feeling when you spin off the tpo of a bottle of ligour wehnt eh cap keeps spinningt but is already complety removed??S I had that noow

Going joggings drunk. wish me luck!

I dont remember making that last post.