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-   -   female probs.....longwinded rant inside!!! (https://www.miataturbo.net/insert-bs-here-4/female-probs-longwinded-rant-inside-7740/)

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:06 AM

female probs.....longwinded rant inside!!!
 
Aright, so i'm living in VA Beach for school, i went home last weekend to see my girfriedn (about 2.5 hours away) and everything was great. Monday morning when i took her home (17 still living with mom and im only 18 for the record) her mom started tripping out on her for something, still not even sure exactly what. anway she told me to leave (her mom) but my GF was begging me to stay close by to make sure she was ok...so i did. Well, i call her mom and try to talk to her reasonably and figure out what the hell is going on so i can atleast tell her bye before i go 3 hours away for the next two months (her mom had already taken away her phones, etc.. at this point) and she started acting like a freakin 3 year old, bitching at me, saying she was gonna call the cops b/c i was stalking her house, etc... when i had been there for 10 minutes trying to say goodbye to my girlfriend.



ANYWAY...they work stuff out over the next few days, everything gets kinda back to normal....until...last night she and her mother were going out to eat somwehere and i was on the phone with her while they were headed there....i dont even know now what brought it up but her mom said something along the lines of "he better not push his luck he still hasn't apologized to me for his sh*t monday!" so i proceed to tell christy (my GF) that i wasn't going to apologize to a 40 year old woman who started acting like a fucking 4 year old when her daughter's 18 BF was trying to make sure she was ok.....about three seconds later my GF says "well, he says he sorry" so i blow up at her....she hangs up, calls me a little while later and says it's over....if this was like a 2 week relationship, oh well, i don't give a fuck, but we've been together for over two years, now i know she has alot of other stuff going on in her life, but should i just let her go, or try to fight to get her back?....i do still love her after all this though



Sorry for the long rant...just needed to get that off of my chest...i'd appreciate any advice but i understand if noone wants to try to tell me what i should do.....

(oh if it makes any difference in how you guys feel about her, she was with me when the diff went last week, and she was just as upset, if not more, than i was about it!!!)

Philip 02-26-2007 11:08 AM

too much drama. kick her to the curb and find some local tail.

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:11 AM


Originally Posted by Philip (Post 86678)
too much drama. kick her to the curb and find some local tail.


god da**it, why do people keep saying that? i don't wanna leave her, but i'm starting to think maybe i should.....

it's just that we've been through alot together, about a week after we hooked up her dad passed away, about a week later her mom tried to committ suicide, so i think that's why we've been so close the whole time, but i don't know, i do love her (and she tells me that she still loves me, but sometimes that's just not enough....whatever that's suppost to mean) but it's just gettin to be too much...for both of us.

Philip 02-26-2007 11:14 AM


Originally Posted by ruger988 (Post 86679)
god da**it, why do people keep saying that? i don't wanna leave her, but i'm starting to think maybe i should.....

it's just that we've been through alot together, about a week after we hooked up her dad passed away, about a week later her mom tried to committ suicide, so i think that's why we've been so close the whole time, but i don't know, i do love her (and she tells me that she still loves me, but sometimes that's just not enough....whatever that's suppost to mean) but it's just gettin to be too much...for both of us.

she's 17, you haven't been through shit together.

Fritch 02-26-2007 11:14 AM

you're whining and bitching over a 2 week relationship?

wtf

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:15 AM


Originally Posted by Philip (Post 86681)
she's 17, you haven't been through shit together.

i know comparitevly we haven't but still....we have been through alot in the amount of time we've been together....her fucking dad died a week after we got together and i drove her to alabama to be there......that's gotta count for something

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:16 AM


Originally Posted by Fritch (Post 86682)
you're whining and bitching over a 2 week relationship?

wtf

no...two year, almost 6 month relationship

Fritch 02-26-2007 11:19 AM


Originally Posted by ruger988 (Post 86684)
no...two year, almost 6 month relationship

oh my mistake, I read it wrong

but still, staying with someone 2.5 hrs away and with psycho fucking parents is never fun. Trust me, it never gets better when there are crazy family nearby

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:20 AM


Originally Posted by Fritch (Post 86687)
oh my mistake, I read it wrong

but still, staying with someone 2.5 hrs away and with psycho fucking parents is never fun. Trust me, it never gets better when there are crazy family nearby


well, we were together when i lived there for just over two years, just moved down here for school (i'll be moving back there for good in about 6 months) but as soon as she moves out...her mom is moving back to alabama and she wants to stay here....so no crazy family nearby

Ben 02-26-2007 11:24 AM

There are certain "rules" in a relationship. One of them is you don't get between your g/f and her mother. You violated that rule, bad move considering she lives at home. Consider the position that you put your g/f in, where she had to choose between her b/f (3 hours away) and her mom (next to her).
You're not supposed to get along with your g/f or wife's mom. They're all insane. If it's asked of you, you swallow your pride and apologize, if you mean it or not. You'll find over time that certain things aren't worth arguing about.

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:27 AM


Originally Posted by Ben (Post 86692)
There are certain "rules" in a relationship. One of them is you don't get between your g/f and her mother. You violated that rule, bad move considering she lives at home. Consider the position that you put your g/f in, where she had to choose between her b/f (3 hours away) and her mom (next to her).
You're not supposed to get along with your g/f or wife's mom. They're all insane. If it's asked of you, you swallow your pride and apologize, if you mean it or not.

no big deal....except for the fac tthat i was ready to leave...but my G/F was begging me to stay and try to talk to her mother (ye si know it sounds weird and i probably shouldn't have) but then we she asks me to apologize for somethig she asked me to do..i say no...and she tells her that i apologized, that just struck me wrong for some reason.......am i wrong in the whole situation?

Philip 02-26-2007 11:29 AM


Originally Posted by ruger988 (Post 86694)
no big deal....except for the fac tthat i was ready to leave...but my G/F was begging me to stay and try to talk to her mother (ye si know it sounds weird and i probably shouldn't have) but then we she asks me to apologize for somethig she asked me to do..i say no...and she tells her that i apologized, that just struck me wrong for some reason.......am i wrong in the whole situation?

you've been dating since she was 15?
you're fucked. Her mom hates you, she lives with her mom. Her mom will rag on you until she believes it.

not to mention she's way too young for anything serious.

boostinsteve 02-26-2007 11:32 AM

I would definately go get some local tail. Women are a very touchy subject, and you are only 18 years old man. There are other fish in the sea. Try to mend the wounds with this one, if it does not work after some effort, go after something else. Good luck man.

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:32 AM


Originally Posted by Philip (Post 86696)
you've been dating since she was 15?
you're fucked. Her mom hates you, she lives with her mom. Her mom will rag on you until she believes it.

not to mention she's way too young for anything serious.

she was 15 yes....but i was 16......her mom's never really around...bnut when she is she's USUALLY ok, then she gets on little trips like last week and blames all of her problems on christy, and all christy's problems on me, so i guess she does pretty much hate me...so i guess i'm just gonna let shit go between us and maybe in a few months/years they'll work themselves out, if not oh-well

thanks guys
Brian

Ben 02-26-2007 11:34 AM


Originally Posted by ruger988 (Post 86694)
then we she asks me to apologize for somethig she asked me to do..i say no...and she tells her that i apologized, that just struck me wrong for some reason.......am i wrong in the whole situation?

Yes, you're wrong, even if you're not wrong. You're dealing with women!
Consider that her mom is already giving your g/f an ear full about you, so she's in an akward position. Then you only made it harder on her.

A couple "rules" will become obvious to you with time:
  • Never get between your g/f and her family, especially her mom
  • Always take your g/f's side
  • Don't do anything to embarass your g/f in front of her mom
You violeted all 3

But for rizeal, she's 3 hours away. Local tail FTW

Arkmage 02-26-2007 11:37 AM

sounds like mommy is bi-polar. tell her to get some meds before she ruins her daughters life and move on.

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:40 AM


Originally Posted by Arkmage (Post 86701)
sounds like mommy is bi-polar. tell her to get some meds before she ruins her daughters life and move on.

i have told her.....and she is.....shes admitted that she is.....i think shes already ruined her life pretty much, i just dont know how much worse it's gonna get with me not being there to help her out anymore....i really do still love her, i care about her, i just cant take catching the shit for EVERYTHING that goes wrong anymore....i know that's any relationship though, that's why part of me want to try to work things out. guess im just leaving it to her

adbradley 02-26-2007 11:49 AM

ive been in your shoes man... you are much better letting go.. you have a long time to work things in your life out.. if shes not in it, then thats just how its gonna be, but you gotta make sure you think about you... I knwo it may seem like you gonna loose it all.. but believe me, you are much better waiting a few more years to make that decision... Im glad i did

ruger988 02-26-2007 11:52 AM


Originally Posted by adbradley (Post 86708)
ive been in your shoes man... you are much better letting go.. you have a long time to work things in your life out.. if shes not in it, then thats just how its gonna be, but you gotta make sure you think about you... I knwo it may seem like you gonna loose it all.. but believe me, you are much better waiting a few more years to make that decision... Im glad i did

I'm gonna let her decide what she wants to do from here...

oh........one more little piece of the puzzle....she's a month late...that might change things a little (even though it's happened before, usually when she's really stressed...like now...and it's been nothing)

cjernigan 02-26-2007 11:55 AM

Man that kind of relationship isnt' healthy for you in the slightest. Living down here is totally different when it comes to relationships. Compared to where I lived in Alaska there is so many women down here that if one causes problems you just move on. I concurr about never getting between a girl and her mother way to much stuff happens then.
So i'm +1 for finding someone local. Being apart from each other causes unnecessary drama on top of having a psycho/suicidal mother that doesn't like you already.


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