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Old 08-09-2011, 06:55 PM   #1
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Default Joe Perez, I will make your dreams come true.

I saw this, and it had your name written all over it.

The Egg of Silence - Personal Office - $3000

(This is a real item for sale despite the tounge-in-cheek description)

This is a project for the person who believes in his/her heart that the universe that can be delivered via electromagnetic transmission is more desirable, more fulfilling and truer to the you that you wish you could be than anything reality has to offer.

It is for the brave soul who would seek to shut out reality in order to quest for his/her true cyber destiny. It is for a person who knows that the rest of the world will believe that you are wiling away the hours plumbing the depths of every reason that parental controls had to be devised. It is for a person who knows that the rest of your family will believe that you will (someday)emerge from the Egg of Solitude and that when you do you will be hairy-palmed, blind, and with your face stuck that way. You know but you don't care because it is easier for them to believe this than for them to digest the truth. You are on a quest. Your Destiny Awaits.

They will not understand. They will say, "Get a job!". They will say, "Get a girlfriend!". They will say,"Where the hell have you been?". They will say, "Holy Crap - Take a shower!". They will say, "My name is on the internet account, *******. If the FBI comes knocking I'm gonna sing like a canary. I'm not going down for you".

They cannot understand because their destinies are so horrifyingly ordinary and pathetic that they cannot concieve of what must be endured to reach and achieve and become!!

The Egg of Solitude was originally part of a Hospital Biomedical Research Lab. It was converted into a personal office by a visionary who was before his time. It was before the LCD flat screen., before the lap dance even. He was handicapped by the technology of his day but was not thwarted. He built it. The Universe of One.

It is wired for power, sound, data, and even phone (how quaint). It housed a CRT screen, ventilation fans, the best computer of its day, 4 speakers converted for use from a car audio system, mood lighting and a Captain's Chair. Long Term CRT particle bombardment in an enclosed space took its toll. The Egg of Solitude is now in disrepair. It awaits a new visionary. One who is versed in modern available technonogy and has a few friends who know how to build stuff and work on car interiors and wire stuff up in such a way that doesn't lead to electrocution. Such a visionary could possibly visualize a full gamers chair, 36+ inches of flat screen, surround sound, lighting effects, maybe even a small frige (definitely a cooler).

The Egg of Solitude is large. It stands 7 feet tall and 9 or so feet wide. A 6 footer can step through the hatch and stand erect, tall and proud, inside the Egg of Solitude, confidently closing out the rest. A 6 foot 2 incher will probably get his hair mussed while standing erect but could still do it.

To begin your quest email me and I will show you the egg. It is a bitch to move and will require a flatbed - not included in the price. $3,000 or best offer and by that I mean best offer above $3,000. Cheap bastards fail on their quests so don't bother lowballing me.
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Joe Perez, I will make your dreams come true.-3ka3pf3o65u25r25s3b811a829dc41c1e1fe3.jpg   Joe Perez, I will make your dreams come true.-3m93pe3o85y35z45r1b818f4a48e817271db5.jpg   Joe Perez, I will make your dreams come true.-3n53od3le5z05p45r5b810970a2cfa8371651.jpg   Joe Perez, I will make your dreams come true.-3nc3m13o15o45u35x6b81bd1d07e83d5b13e0.jpg  
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Old 08-09-2011, 08:03 PM   #2
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Old 08-09-2011, 08:22 PM   #3
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You know, if there was a door large enough to fit that thing through to actually get it into the office, I do believe I would buy it. Even for $3,000 and a forklift rental.
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