Are we breaking out Chuck Norris jokes?


If you have $5 dollars and Chuck Norris has $5 dollars, he has more money.

There is no chin under Chuck Norris's beard, its another fist.

when chuck norris enters a room,

he doesnt turn the lights on,

he turns the dark off....

scientist were recently able to tap into the power of one chuck Norris round house kick,
they said it powered San Fransisco for three months

A little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of
turpentine and shaking it up and watching all the
bubbles. A while later a Priest came along and asked
the little boy what he had.

The little boy replied, 'This is the most powerful
liquid in the world, it's called turpentine.'

The Priest said, 'No, the most powerful liquid in the
world is Holy Water. If you take some of this Holy
Water and rub it on a pregnant women's belly,
she'll pass a healthy baby.'

The little boy replied, 'You take some of this here
turpentine and rub it on a cat's ass and he'll
pass a Harley Davidson.'

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris doesn't need to swallow when eating food.

Vash-

I feel there is too much homosexual tension for chuck norris on the internet.

Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men...that night all three will wear a leather bodice, stiletto heels and a mask over their eyes.

After a few days they meet again.....

The engaged girlfriend: "The other night when my boyfriend came back home, he found me with the leather bodice, 4" stilettos and a mask. When he saw me he said, "You are the woman of my life, I love you"...then we made love all night long.

The mistress: "Ah! Me too, the other night I met my lover in the office and I was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat, he didn't say anything.....but we made wild love all night."

The married one: "The other night I sent the kids to stay at my mother's for the night. I got myself ready- leather bodice, super stilettos and mask over my eyes. My husband comes home from work, opens the door and says, "Hey Batman, what's for dinner?"

A dyslexic walked into a bra...