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Old 09-29-2012, 10:50 PM   #1
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Default My weekend at lemons gave me AIDS

My lemons weekend:
  • Show up Friday morning at the track, I'm told to go help with the car 1-hour south...they said it was 15-minutes south.
  • Car is not ready, so I ******* worked on it from 8-11am
  • We get to the track and these idiots did not wire-in a kill switch so I did that
  • I couldn't even get these idiots to zip-tie a timer into the car. ******* retarded.
  • I was told they bought tires...they bought used tires in the barrio.
  • We finally get through tech to realize, the team owner never paid for the test day we were trying to run
  • The next day, I discovered the tires were from the barrio and not the Dirrezzas I told them to order
  • We looped the car three times in 5 laps
  • I took the car out and discovered the tires they had were soooooo old, they were like plastic, car is dangerous.
  • I get back to find they never hooked up the front sway bar, car owner refuses to hook it up.
  • So they decide to go buy tires, but they only brought 1 jack stand., solution is to tow the car to the tire shop.
  • Car won't start at the tire shop
  • They come back, decide to put the ******* tires on
  • I packed my **** up and left.
  • I get a text where they took the car out looped it, sat for one hour
  • Then, they took the car out at the end of the day and apparently they never torqued the wheels, so the front wheel fell off and they crashed into two cars.
  • The team was told to never return and Lemons people did not want to see their faces at the track tomorrow.

I'm never doing that **** again. This car was the scariest, most dangerous car I've ever driven. We would have known this if the first test day were not lost to a car that would not start because wire the ground into the kill switch, or if the second test day weren't lost because the brake lines were dry and they didn't know why.

The next time I go W2W it will be in a kart and finally a car I build for PTE. I originally did this to get some W2W experience so I could drive with RHArris at their next Chump race. I knew these guys were idiots and should have bailed a long time ago, but I really wanted to get on track before running Chump with my buddies. Now, I am not really sure I want to do this whole "crap car endurance racing" thing. I want to drive cars that handle well and are safe.

Last edited by hustler; 09-30-2012 at 03:48 PM.
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:25 PM   #2
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what kind of car?
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:30 PM   #3
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And how'd you get hooked up with such a shitty team? At least you bailed on them like you should have the day before...

Your name didn't get associated with them after they got punted?
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:35 PM   #4
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what kind of car?
93 Cavalier
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And how'd you get hooked up with such a shitty team? At least you bailed on them like you should have the day before...

Your name didn't get associated with them after they got punted?
I got stuck with that team because I'm a novice W2W racer. It's become clear to me that in order to get experience, I have to build my own car. That's going to be a couple years or more, but whatever.

The team is blacklisted, but I won't run with Lemons again considering they black-flag you for oversteering.
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:45 PM   #5
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93 Cavalier
I want you to know that I literally laughed out loud when I read that, which hurt like **** with a load of broken ribs.

So thanks for that.


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It's become clear to me that in order to get experience, I have to build my own car.
That, or hook up with one of the various Miata teams which pop up from time to time around here.


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The team is blacklisted, but I won't run with Lemons again considering they black-flag you for oversteering.
To be fair, they also crush your car with a bulldozer for being unpopular. By comparison, a black flag is a blow job. You missed out on the Penalty Circus, which so far as I can tell is the best part of a LeMons weekend.

It sounds like you just got hooked up with a team who had no business being out there in the first place, and that has soured your outlook on what has got to be one of the funnest forms of wheel-2-wheel racing you can participate in.
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:57 PM   #6
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In my limited experience:

Lemons priorities:
1. Shinamagans
2. Themes
3. ????
4. Racing

Chump car:
1. Racing
2. Themes
3.????
4. Shinanagans

Your experience may vary, and like I said I have little experience but from what I've read I would not want to participate in lemons. Stick to chump.

Lots if cars finish the race, proving there are good teams. You just have to find them.
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:57 PM   #7
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I think the real highlight of the weekend was watching the teammate's pure-bred (inbred) Boston Terriers **** on the floor in the house, then eat their own hot ****. I have cats for a reason.
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Old 09-30-2012, 12:01 AM   #8
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To be fair, they also crush your car with a bulldozer for being unpopular. By comparison, a black flag is a blow job. You missed out on the Penalty Circus, which so far as I can tell is the best part of a LeMons weekend.

It sounds like you just got hooked up with a team who had no business being out there in the first place, and that has soured your outlook on what has got to be one of the funnest forms of wheel-2-wheel racing you can participate in.
I told my buddy to get everyone to vote for our car to go to the crusher.

I clearly did get hooked-up with a team that should not be on a track. However, in the half-lap I ran, I realized a couple things. I don't want to learn W2W racing in the rain, in a **** car, with other green drivers. I want to learn W2W racing in a good car, where I can put the car where I want it on track. I'm becoming a decently fast driver these days, confidence is up thanks to a little validation from Miatas @ Hallett this year, I know I can handle a car and I know I have good car control, but I don't want to wad-up someone's car because I'm inexperienced. With that said, I don't want anywhere near a racetrack for the next few months, I've had enough for a while. I felt so good and pumped after Hallett this year, now I don't want to do this hobby anymore.
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Old 09-30-2012, 12:03 AM   #9
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Lemons priorities:
1. Shinamagans
2. Themes
3. ????
4. Racing
Hahaha.

I've never even been to a LeMons race, much less participated in one, but it sounds like a hoot for exactly the reasons you've described. Costumes, penalties, bribery, dancing, cross-dressers, and also a race.


I've heard Team Fortress 2 described as a combat-themed interactive hat simulator. Might be. Still a lot of fun.
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Old 09-30-2012, 12:05 AM   #10
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Hahaha.

I've never even been to a LeMons race, much less participated in one, but it sounds like a hoot for exactly the reasons you've described. Costumes, penalties, bribery, dancing, cross-dressers, and also a race.


I've heard Team Fortress 2 described as a combat-themed interactive hat simulator. Might be. Still a lot of fun.
It sucks because it's not about racing, it's about "being there". Chump is far superior in every way.
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Old 09-30-2012, 12:09 AM   #11
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It sucks because it's not about racing, it's about "being there".
Well, yeah. Kind of like Burning Man, but with fewer **** and poorer welding.

Sounds like an absolute blast to me, but I can certainly see your point in that racing is clearly not the #1 priority.
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Old 09-30-2012, 12:12 AM   #12
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I think the real highlight of the weekend was watching the teammate's pure-bred (inbred) Boston Terriers **** on the floor in the house, then eat their own hot ****. I have cats for a reason.
LOL! To hell with ankle-biter foo foo dogs. My parents have two of those ****-zoos and they suck.
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Old 09-30-2012, 02:35 PM   #13
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I think the real highlight of the weekend was watching the teammate's pure-bred (inbred) Boston Terriers **** on the floor in the house, then eat their own hot ****. I have cats for a reason.
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LOL! To hell with ankle-biter foo foo dogs. My parents have two of those ****-zoos and they suck.
We had a Boston when I was growing up. There is nothing wrong with the breed, or dogs in general. the problem is the owners. Its the same things with kids: raise them correctly and they won't **** in the house or grow up to be juvenile delinquents.

I understand the "barrio tires" thing. Was the owner an old dude? My Dad is an old dude and he's a certified cheap-*** about tires and he puts the barrio specials on his Ranger. Unfortunately I borrow it from time to time.

Me: Dad, there are cracks in the sidewalls!
Dad: But look, they are almost full tread! These things'll go for years!
Me: You know, there is more to tires than just how many miles you can get out of them
Dad: Well, if you got your car aligned properly, you'd get 60k out of a set of tires, like me.
Me:

Plastic hard as **** tires is scary y0.

It sounds like you did the right thing and got away from the Lemons guys. Lemons ≠ serious and it sounds like you want something a little more "real." From the description above, it sounds like Chump is where its at.

You could always try to get into a Spec car
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Old 09-30-2012, 02:50 PM   #14
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If an animal eats excrement, it's not good enough for me nor my carpet.

Spec Miata is for old men who want to fight among themselves and pre-teen rich boys on daddy's nickel. I'll take PTE with good suspension.
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Old 09-30-2012, 03:32 PM   #15
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Well, yeah. Kind of like Burning Man, but with fewer **** and poorer welding.

Sounds like an absolute blast to me, but I can certainly see your point in that racing is clearly not the #1 priority.
Hahaha yes. Lemons is indeed, burning man at a racetrack.

A lemons race is actually not super cheap either. Yes the car may have been cheap but good wear items (which many teams do indeed pay for) plus safety = $$$$. Like burning man too. Burning man is actually very expensive. This year i spent about $3000.

And yes a lot of bman fabrication is flat out godly.
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Old 09-30-2012, 03:49 PM   #16
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Yeah, I'd rather do this in a proper car rather than a shitbox.
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Old 09-30-2012, 04:54 PM   #17
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The next time I go W2W it will be in a kart and finally a car I build for PTE. I originally did this to get some W2W experience so I could drive with RHArris at their next Chump race. I knew these guys were idiots and should have bailed a long time ago, but I really wanted to get on track before running Chump with my buddies. Now, I am not really sure I want to do this whole "crap car endurance racing" thing. I want to drive cars that handle well and are safe.
After December, your view will change. When you are driving on a team that has a well sorted car and has their **** together, it is a hell of a lot of fun. I mean you saw it first hand in May. The main thing is that you need to make sure you run with like minded teams in the future and you will get a lot more out of it. You have a standing open invitation to all our future events and I guarantee you wont be able to get enough of it.

Don't base an opinions of this form of W2W on this previous weekend. Its experience/cost ratio is the best around by far.
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Old 09-30-2012, 05:58 PM   #18
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I agree with your main points. I'm sorry you got stuck with an awful team, dude.

I've done Lemons and Chump both now, and there are a LOT of Lemons teams that shouldn't be anywhere near a race track. I ran Lemons in a very well prepared car, and found it quite annoying that you would get black flagged for... exploring the limits is what I'll say.

Chump we ran at Sebring (I was actually with Sixshooter), in a 914 with HORRIBLE ownership and so on. We ran with crappy tires and crappy brakes. We managed to finish and it was the most fun I've probably ever had. Yes, we were getting our doors blown off every lap, but we actually managed to run a pretty solid race. That car I didn't feel was very safe (the rear subframe actually came loose when I was on track), but I was ok with it because the rollcage was one of the best I've ever seen (made for SCCA racing, very well put together) so I figured when I went into the wall I'd probably be ok.

I am now talking with a team that runs a very competitive Miata, and I think I'll feel much more at home. Its really down to the team. I think Crapcan racing is pretty awesome, as its pretty cheap W2W experiece. I can put up with the horrible management of Chumpcar (and it is really bad management) for that. I don't have the money to run a car in PTE, or SM yet, so this is a good starting point.

Just my 2 cents based on the experiences I've had. I would suggest maybe finding a team with a honda, bmw or miata and trying it with them, you will probably like it a lot more, and there are always simple arrive and drive opportunities.
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Old 09-30-2012, 06:14 PM   #19
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93 Cavalier
You expected that a team that campaigns a Cavvy would have their **** together???
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Old 09-30-2012, 06:31 PM   #20
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I'm giving this one more go with RHarris, but I'm pretty nervous about learning W2W on a competitive team. I hope I get out there and it's not too much for me.
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