The AI-generated cat pictures thread
09-20-2013, 07:58 AM
Boost Pope
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“Let me see if I understand you,” said Dirk. “You say you lost your cat, er, ‘Gusty,’ while you’ve been standing here talking to me?”
“No. I lost him—or sort of half-lost him—two weeks ago. But I last saw him, which is what you asked, just before I came into your office. I just checked to see he was okay. Which he was. Well, sort of okay. If you can call it okay.”
“And ... er, where was he, exactly, when you checked to see that he was okay?”
She went out of the room and returned with a medium-sized wickerwork cat box. She put it down on Dirk’s desk. Its contents mewed slightly. She closed the door behind her.
Dirk frowned.
“Excuse me if I’m being a little obtuse,” he said, looking round the basket at her. “Tell me which bit of this I’ve got wrong. It seems to me that you are asking me if I will exercise my professional skills to search for and if possible find and return to you a cat ...”
“Yes.”
“... which you already have with you in a cat basket?”
“Well, that’s right up to a point.”
“And which point is that?”
“Have a look for yourself.”
She slid out the metal rod that held the lid in place, reached into the basket, lifted out the cat, and put him down on Dirk’s desk, next to the basket. Dirk looked at him.
He—Gusty—looked at him.
There is a particular disdain with which Siamese cats regard you. Anyone who has accidentally walked in on the Queen cleaning her teeth will be familiar with this feeling.
Gusty looked at Dirk and clearly found him reprehensible in some way. He turned away, yawned, stretched, groomed his whiskers briefly, licked down a small patch of ruffled fur, then leapt lightly off the table and started carefully to examine a splinter of floorboard, which he found to be far more interesting than Dirk.
Dirk stared wordlessly at Gusty.
Up to a point, Gusty looked exactly like a normal Siamese cat. Up to a point. The point up to which Gusty looked like a normal Siamese cat was his waist, which was marked by a narrrow, cloudy grey band.
“The front half looks quite well,” said Melinda whatever-her-name-was in a small voice. “Quite sleek and healthy, really.”
“And the back half?” said Dirk.
“Is what I want you to look for.”
“It isn’t invisible,” said Melinda, picking the cat up, awkwardly. “It’s actually not there.” She passed her hand back and forth through clear air, where the cat’s hindquarters should have been. The cat twisted and turned in her grip, mewling crossly, then leapt nimbly to the ground and stalked about in an affronted manner.
“My, my,” said Dirk, steepling his fingers under his chin. “That is odd.”
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09-20-2013, 10:04 PM
Boost Pope
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It is with no small measure of pride that I announce my victory.
I have won the internet.
I have found the absolute most random thing imagineable. A guy with a Darth Vader mask, playing flaming bagpipes, while riding a unicycle:
I have won the internet.
I have found the absolute most random thing imagineable. A guy with a Darth Vader mask, playing flaming bagpipes, while riding a unicycle:
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09-20-2013, 10:27 PM
Boost Pope
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I'm wondering... is it even physically possible for me to build an electric unicycle? Because that would rock.
Yet another reason why I ♥ NY: We actually have a Big Gay Ice Cream Truck!
Yet another reason why I ♥ NY: We actually have a Big Gay Ice Cream Truck!
Last edited by Joe Perez; 09-20-2013 at 10:42 PM.
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09-20-2013, 10:31 PM
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Last edited by Joe Perez; 09-20-2013 at 10:42 PM.
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09-21-2013, 07:47 AM
Boost Pope
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I mean, it does have one wheel. But it also appears to be large, heavy, and incapable of being pedaled. So, by that account, it's no more an electric unicycle than a Brammo Empulse RR is an electric bicycle.
This is rather closer to what I had in mind, though still no pedals:
These people actually have exactly the right idea in terms of desired application:
Aaah, whatever... I'm just going to post images of women riding unicycles and unicycle-like objects...
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09-21-2013, 02:55 PM
Boost Pope
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So, this is just freaking brilliant:
For those unfamiliar, it's a pretty common occurrence for someone to hop into a subway car just before the doors close and walk around telling a sob story with a cup in their hand hoping for some change. They always seem to sound pretty much the same, a sort of monotonous, half-shouting delivery which this guy has got down just absolutely perfect.
For those unfamiliar, it's a pretty common occurrence for someone to hop into a subway car just before the doors close and walk around telling a sob story with a cup in their hand hoping for some change. They always seem to sound pretty much the same, a sort of monotonous, half-shouting delivery which this guy has got down just absolutely perfect.
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