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Old 06-04-2009, 06:20 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by Newbsauce View Post
Watch "Idiocracy"... its a horrible movie, but damnit if it isn't spot on.
SOOOOOOOOOOO true. I'm reminded of that movie on almost a daily basis.
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Old 06-04-2009, 09:10 PM   #22
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I was just telling someone about that movie today. Its got electrolytes!
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Old 06-04-2009, 09:20 PM   #23
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"It's got what plants crave!"
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Old 06-04-2009, 09:24 PM   #24
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Old 06-04-2009, 09:43 PM   #25
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I'm looking at the test Joe linked to. I'm on the instruction page and already pissed off.

#6 "Think positively. Some questions may seem hard, but others will be easy."

#8 "Relax. Some people get nervous about tests. It's natural. Just do your best."

2 of 8 instructions for taking the test are about making the student feel good! One of them is even written improperly. They put a comma in the sentence before the word but. The test creators fail at their own test!

I'm no whiz kid but in grade school I was taking advance placement classes. They gave us all sorts of tests intended for high schoolers. That 10th grade stuff was cake in 5th grade. Looking at those tests Joe posted they should be cake for a reasonably bright 11-12 year old. Public schools are about graduating the largest percentage of students possible. It seems against the rules to challenge a students brain at any time. Can't hurt a student's self image by having them fail can we?!?

I'm off to Starbucks for a handjob and the latest episode of "ow, my *****". Maybe I can score some extra big *** fries on the way.

Last edited by cueball1; 06-04-2009 at 09:54 PM.
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Old 06-04-2009, 10:46 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by cueball1 View Post
Public schools are about graduating the largest percentage of students possible.
Actually, the thing that bothers me about this sort of policy is that it leads schools to "teach the test" so to speak. In other words, rather than covering a broad curriculum, schools have an incentive to spend a great amount of their time and budget specifically preparing students to take the standardized test, on the basis that the school will be judged by these scores and rewarded (financially) accordingly.

The city of Mason OH, where I lived for a few years, was notoriously guilty of this practice. They do in fact have a reputation for having some of the "best" public schools in the state. It is has been widely noted however that, being located in an area which reaps significant tax revenue from the many corporations whose headquarters, R&D departments and relatively highly-paid employees which are located there, the schools are able to afford comprehensive third party test-prep materials and consultants.

Example: Kaplan: Solutions for K-12 Schools. Improve Performance on State Tests. Build Proficiency to Meet State Standards



It should be noted that, as a broad generalization, Florida public schools are poorer than hell. When I was in HS, we (the student body) were broadly segregated into two groups. One group was the kids who they figured were college-bound, the other group was the ones they just hoped they could hang a diploma on so they could get a job fixing air conditioners. Even in the "smart" group (about 150-200 of us in total per grade level), I had many a class where there were not enough textbooks for everybody to have one, so instead there was just a single class set (maybe 30-40 textbooks) which were kept in the classroom, and you could check one out overnight if you needed to. Obviously 200 kids vying for 30-40 books per class x 5 classes made for quite a mad rush the instant the closing bell rang. The classrooms at Charlotte High were spread out over several one-story buildings (and one three story building on the verge of collapse) covering a pretty large area, so you kinda had to prioritize which book you were going to run for first, keeping in mind that the bus drivers waited for no one.

On the other hand, we did have a pretty decent football field. Nice weightroom, clean showers, lights, plenty of parking, etc.
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Old 06-04-2009, 10:50 PM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by that link
teacher should just fail a kid for just bringing up creationism as a topic for a science fair project. Seriously. Fail, get the **** out of my class.
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Old 06-06-2009, 01:39 AM   #28
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That craigslist ad looks deliberately misspelled to me. I've seen people post like that before, with almost every word wrong. I don't think this is the product of stupidity; this is someone looking for more attention from browsers.
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Old 06-06-2009, 02:44 AM   #29
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Check out answers.yahoo.com if you want to see how bright the 13-16 year olds are now days...
Even better look here: The Worst And Saddest Of Yahoo! Answers - Geekologie

Both my parents are teachers. Sadly in Utah you can’t even get an F any more until you get into 7th grade. None of the kids have any motivation because of this. Instead of blaming the parents the districts blame the teachers, saying they "Don’t care enough, if anyone in their class is failing”. Their jobs are at risk, because of students that don't give a ****, because their parents don’t give a ****.
In turn the teachers really do just stop giving a ****, and give all the kids who don’t work C's and the few kids who do A's. When the standardized tests come around it's not uncommon for teachers to give the students the answers as they are taking the test; as the higher the average score the school has the better the chance they have at getting government grants and what not, that was the principals idea.
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Old 06-06-2009, 03:09 PM   #30
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well, you're ***** all retarded and you talk like a ***.
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Old 06-07-2009, 11:16 PM   #31
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The "poor" local school district just figured out that it could save $700,000 by buying napkins for the cafeterias that weren't embossed with the Hillsborough County Schools logo.

They are crying about their budgets and needing to make cutbacks, but since the building boom went bust and all of the migrant (illegal) workers left town (attendance is down by 27% countywide), they are building new schools like it's going out of style. Less brats, more buildings, go figure.
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Old 06-08-2009, 01:04 AM   #32
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Anyone else notice how "Vitamin water" sounds an awful lot like BRAWNDO?

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Old 06-08-2009, 10:10 AM   #33
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elesjuan View Post
Anyone else notice how "Vitamin water" sounds an awful lot like BRAWNDO?

if its not clear, has a flavor, or has marketing behind it...its not water.
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Old 06-08-2009, 11:30 AM   #34
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How many are old enough to know what Brawndo The Thirst Mutilator is actually paying homage to?

Yeah, I used to drink it back in the 80's

Rondo: The Thirst Crusher
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Old 06-08-2009, 02:14 PM   #35
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The following claims to be true, but even if not, it's still full of win.

The following was published in The New York Times. This is a NYU college admissions application essay question, and an actual answer written by an applicant.

Question 3A: In order for the admissions staff of our college to get to know you, the applicant, better, we ask that you answer the following question:

Are there any significant experiences you have had or accomplishments you have realized that have helped to define you as a person?

Answer:

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch break, making them more efficient in the area of heart retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees. I write award-winning operas. I manage time efficiently. Occasionally I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and god-like trombone playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook thirty-minute brownies in only twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, and I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I am bored I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays after school I repair electrical appliances free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I donít perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive large quantities of fan mail. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat 400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis racquets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise lost, David Copperfield and Moby Dick in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed covert operations for the CIA. I sleep only once a week, and when I do, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation In Canada I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics donít apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and all of my bills are paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four-course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis. But I have not yet gone to college.

He was accepted.
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Old 06-08-2009, 02:58 PM   #36
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"Welcome to Costco, I love you"
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Old 06-09-2009, 09:53 AM   #37
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elesjuan View Post
Anyone else notice how "Vitamin water" sounds an awful lot like BRAWNDO?

I was volunteering at USO Friday and we were putting Tang packets into the care packages. First of all, I didn't know Tang still existed. Second... Tang looks ALOT like brawndo.


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Old 06-11-2009, 02:05 PM   #38
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Disturbingly, you can now buy Brawndo in 16oz cans: ThinkGeek :: Brawndo High Caffeine Energy Drink
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Old 06-11-2009, 02:54 PM   #39
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Quote:
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The test is already too damn easy. Have a look for yourself: Florida's Comprehensive Assessment Test (FCAT)


My rule of thumb is, fail the FCAT= you're stupid. I remember getting off the plane December 26, 2000 from a third world county, two weeks after I was enrolled in school with the coming up FCAt. I passed with more than fare scores in the english section, and with way above average scores in the math and science. Now here is the punch-line all I really knew how to say was "may I go to the bathroom?" and there were kids fluent on english that failed both O_o. The second time when I took in 10th grade I fell asleep, literally knocked out, half-way into the test and I scored relatively high scores. Anyways is really upseting to know that when you ask someone for the cosine of angle they think you mispelled cousin. About "Idiocracy" late +1, which also reminds me of Chris Rock's "Bigger and Blacker" (I think) when he remarks that in today's society people love not to know ****, and it's true. Well gotta get back to work hopefully I dont wake up tomorrow to know that we use gatorate to water our plants just because it has electrolytes.
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Old 06-11-2009, 04:04 PM   #40
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Some of that is pretty bad. I blame parents. My mom was a single mother with 4 kids. She worked nights as a nurse well going to school and taking care of us. Yet she still raised all of us to be respectful and hard working. There is no excuse for bad parenting.
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