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Confession: I HONK at slowpokes

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Old 08-27-2010, 12:28 PM
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Default Confession: I HONK at slowpokes

Boy do I ever. I'm always ready to honk at 4-way stop signs when I'm behind one, and he and another car at the intersection are at an impasse, both waiting for the other to go, frozen into inaction. One time I honked, and they *both* sprang into action, nearly hitting each other. Nearly pissed myself laughing.

I hate slowpokes almost as much as traffic enforcement cops. I don't mind slowpokes much if they're not in the left lane. What's worst is when a slowpoke drives side by side with a fellow slowpoke, blocking all lanes. That's when my air horns get a workout.

One time a Prius was accelerating soooo glacially slowly that he hit the timed lights just as they turned red. At the next opportunity, I passed him, and just as my rear tires passed his open window, I lit up the rear tires.

Any other confessions?
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:34 PM
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i take a back road to work and the limit is 35, people will do 20 down it. most mornings i just drive in the oncoming lane.
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:48 PM
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I try hard to control my road rage, but there's one specific situation that really just kills me for the 1.5 seconds that it costs me.

Approaching a 4 way stop. Another car is approaching from the right hand side (perpendicular to my path). Other car reaches the 4 way stop before me. Instead of stopping, and then continuing, they stop, and the WAIT till I get to the 4 way stop, then finally once I've come to a complete stop, they crawl through the intersection, forcing me to sit there and watch them.

Now, if I were in the habit of flying up to stop signs and braking at the last minute, then okay, I can see that maybe they'd want to be sure that I'm really stopping. But we're talking about neighborhood speeds. They could stop and then continue through the intersection well before I go through the intersection even if I didn't stop.

Kills me every time.
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Old 08-27-2010, 12:49 PM
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Oh yes, my first option is to simply pass at the next opportunity. But on a back road if I can't and said slowpoke doesn't use the turnouts with the big signs "SLOWER CARS USE TURNOUT", my air horns start getting excited.
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:02 PM
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I HATE... when you try and pass someone that is in the right lane... and as soon as you get up to speed next to them they accelerate to the passing speed... Forcing me to go faster. This happened on my trip home from MS, and it almost got me a ticket.

Speed limit is 70, I'm going 72. I'm getting passed by some people, and passing some. Well I get up to this car and go to pass, no one is behind me so I just keep going my 72 and start to creep past them. Then when I almost get head to head he starts going my speed... are you kidding me? So I start to speed up.. he does too. So I floored it and hit 80ish and go figure there is a cop sitting up ahead with his little radar. Well he pops a boner and pulls me over.

This happened like 10 times. After that If they tried that **** I would back off and get 2-3ft from their bumper... then when I can see far enough down the road for a cop check I fly pass them. Mississippi and Louisiana have terrible drivers.
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:06 PM
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I got an air horn on my new bike, but never use, I just blow past them. A smart rider always keeps 4-5 lugnuts in his jacket pocket for when **** gets out of hand.

In the miata, with no horn at all, the front license plate is used as nudging device. One day I'm going to put someone in the wall on the highway for being nuisance to me.
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:10 PM
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I have no horn...so am forced to be a complete and total ******* when confronted with idiocy on the road.

Like Bond, I've taken to 2 wheels in the past few seasons, and it's easier to twist the wrist than find the damn horn button. I hate tickets and all, but it's pretty easy to use spurts of speed to dodge idiots and resume your regularly schedule 5-10mph over once they are left with ringing ears from your shorty exhaust, 200yds behind you now.
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:26 PM
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I think my road rage gets worse every day. when I'm at an intersection, and directly across from me people are turning left in front of me because they have the green turn light, there will always be the ******** that try to get through at the last second.

When my light turns green i actively try to hit the stragglers. Scared the **** out of some lady on her phone once. I bet that's the last time she runs a red turn light.
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:27 PM
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I hate people that run red lights...I hate them even more when they're on the phone. I have, multiple times, turned around and given those people a piece of my mind..and sometimes whatever metallic objects I can get my hands on. It's something that kills and injures soooo many people but is completely preventable.

People that bum-rush a turn lane to cut up a line of traffic to get over. I block..I block like a mother ******...and if the idiot in front me let lets them in..thei air horns get activated.

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Old 08-27-2010, 01:30 PM
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^similar to the above mentioned is when there is a lane closure and the non-closed lane is backed up.. you get the ******* that drives all the way to the lane closed sign and then tries to merge. I **** block that **** like no other...
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:46 PM
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i'm forced to take a mandatory defensive driving class from my employer, due to a road rage incident i was in, in a company vehicle. nothing too much, brake check, , and a "get off the phone you ----" i despise people that get close enough to see the threads in my top
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:50 PM
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Damn Calvin lol
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:54 PM
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damn you mike for not going to tech day tomorrow!
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Old 08-27-2010, 01:59 PM
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Originally Posted by Bond
I got an air horn on my new bike, but never use, I just blow past them. A smart rider always keeps 4-5 lugnuts in his jacket pocket for when **** gets out of hand.
A buddy of mine carries C and D old batteries on his road bike. Just make sure you have plan B when the driver does a U turn.

lead > battery


Brand is optional, I guess Dollar Tree will do the job.
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Old 08-27-2010, 02:00 PM
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Originally Posted by FRT_Fun
^similar to the above mentioned is when there is a lane closure and the non-closed lane is backed up.. you get the ******* that drives all the way to the lane closed sign and then tries to merge. I **** block that **** like no other...
This is probably my only vice. If I sat here for this long, he can, too.

When driving my quad cab 4x4 Dodge, which is big enough to claim "food chain" on most vehicles, I will slid up next to a semi that is already in the correct lane and pace him. Inevitably there will be a line behind me. When it is forced down to one lane, the truck driver who is also normally pissed because people slide in front of him every surge because he can't start and stop quickly, always let's me in, I look, point and always get a wave in. The cheaters behind me are stuck there, literally stopped. They have a tough time getting in because right at the merge it is usually picking back up to normal speed and they are parked there in the absolute head of the line and everyone knows exactly why.

Other than that, I don't sweat slow drivers or slow stop signs and I can't remember the last time I used my horn.
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Old 08-27-2010, 02:06 PM
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Better watch yourself on that ****....a guy I used to work with didn't come back from his lunch break one day. He shows up the next day and tells us a story.

He was driving downtown, didn't like how close someone was following him, and decided a little brake check was the correct response. The car behind responded by pulling even closer to his bumper and flashing his lights several times. So my coworker grabs a handful of quarters out of his center console, opens his sunroof, and tosses them into the air. Watches them scatter over the hood and windshield of the car.

Following car is now pursuing him, and he's a little worried. He's in straight up evasion mode now. Finally, he gets boxed in by traffic and the other car pulls into the next lane beside him and starts honking. He looks over, and the driver has got his police badge flipped open flat against the window. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.
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Old 08-27-2010, 02:12 PM
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anyone who's ever been on the phone with me while driving can attest I honk at everyone...
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Old 08-27-2010, 02:34 PM
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Originally Posted by FRT_Fun
^similar to the above mentioned is when there is a lane closure and the non-closed lane is backed up.. you get the ******* that drives all the way to the lane closed sign and then tries to merge. I **** block that **** like no other...
I wish I had links to studies that suggest filling up all available road space (rather than merging early) reduces congestion. but it was only something i heard a long time ago on tv.
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Old 08-27-2010, 02:36 PM
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There are three actions on the road I hate pretty much more than any other.

1. Another driver who pulls out in front of you at the last second (when there's no one behind you) and then proceeds to drive significantly under the speed limit. Not only do you have to slam on the brakes to avoid hitting them, you now have to wait for them to get out of your way or for a possibility to pass them.

2. People who cannot comprehend how to function in a left turn lane when the oncoming traffic must yield when turning right. These are the idiots who wait until the road is completely clear of all traffic before making a left turn. There's an intersection like this on my way to work every morning, almost all of the opposing traffic turns right, and people sit in the left turn lane and wait. I'm glad I bought a very loud air horn.

3. The situations mentioned above where everyone is slowly pacing each other allowing no one to pass or when you attempt to pass and they speed up.
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Old 08-27-2010, 02:40 PM
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Originally Posted by y8s
I wish I had links to studies that suggest filling up all available road space (rather than merging early) reduces congestion. but it was only something i heard a long time ago on tv.
The book Traffic covers this issue. I read some of it, but it's a pretty tedious book....would be a much better 10 or 12 page Vanity Fair article.
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