MT.net may be ruining my life. (g/f drama inside) - Miata Turbo Forum - Boost cars, acquire cats.

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Old 07-22-2009, 09:28 PM   #1
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Default MT.net may be ruining my life. (g/f drama inside)

Okay fellas.

Two days ago I was surfing miata turbo at work and all the sudden the website stopped working for me... I get an odd feeling they were watching me through the network and blocked it. So I'm sweating bullets waiting to get an email or a phone call telling me I owe the company $x,xxx in all the time I've wasted sitting in front of MT.net on their dime.

Tonight I'm on here again and the g/f walks in and tells me I'm stagnant and I need a life change. I explain I don't feel like I need any change at all. I'm buying a fixer upper house as she knows, to invest my time/effort/money into.. and how school just isn't on my mind right now. She's been in college 6 years and is signed up for 4 more for pharmacy school.... education **** chasing the all-mighty dollar. Then she bitches about me sitting here rather than working out (oddly enough she just started working out 2 weeks ago) even though I was working out from Oct-Apr when my membership got cancelled (was on a family plan... long story). I blow the hell up ranting about how my life is the **** - however boring it may be - and how I'm content and "I'll do MY LIFE, you do YOUR LIFE." She says I need to get up and do SOMETHING... then proceeds to cry.

Dewds... wtf should I be doing?

I'm 23. (EDIT: Live on my own, have since I was 19) I've been out of school a year an a half, have no career ambitions (honestly: I want to do SOMETHING, just can't decide what...) which is why I stopped going to community college, and I was paying for it out of pocket because I refuse to get swallowed up by student loans. I've got $15k in the bank, made $42k last year doing maintenance thanks to my boss retiring 2 years ago and me taking his spot. Have 3 cars, 2 of which need work (rear end for the camaro, miata needs lots of attention). I own all my own ****, have no debt, and close on my first house Monday. Appraisal value is $120k.


I'm telling you all this because I figure the more details the better to evaluate me by.

WTF am I apparantly doing wrong here?

Do I need moral suport ("it's okay to be content and just relax...") or do I need a swift kick in the pants?

She just came back in bitching that she thinks I need to read over an occupational handbook and start aiming towards one of them as my goal... I've never really had any one career that stuck out in my mind that I wanted to do, which is why I've sorta fallen into what I do now.

/rant

\frustration...

Last edited by Project84; 07-22-2009 at 10:48 PM.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:34 PM   #2
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Join the army...you'll get paid to get way from her and you'll be doing something with yourself .... National Gard would have the same results for a little while, then just the latter half afterwards.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:37 PM   #3
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I've never enjoyed the thought of moving, otherwise I would've joined the army years ago to make my Father proud. He was in for 6 years.

Fact: I was forced to move w/ my parents from Northern KY to Cleveland, OH (250 miles) at age 18, which provoked me to move out and come back to Northern KY at age 19 and begin my life.

Plus like I said, I just bought a house... I won't be going anywhere for quite a while because of that.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:42 PM   #4
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Ditch her? Sounds like a money grubber.. :P

I have no constructive advice to add. My relationship skills are poor at best. Good luck, Sir.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:45 PM   #5
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You're fine man. Nothin wrong with the way your **** is going. Just because she cant imagine how you could be happy not busting your *** in school toward some occupation doesn't mean she needs to kill your buzz.

I'm 23 as well (in 8 days) and just starting in school (first year). I love it, but it was by no pressure from my girlfriend or anyone else that I decided to go. My girlfriend has been supportive of anything I want to do, even wasting money on my car and autocrossing. Hell, she even helps me work on my car and autocrosses with me. She was even supportive of me when I decided to quit my $40/hr job and start living the american dream of student loan debt.

You need one like that.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:47 PM   #6
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I have a house on the other side of the country and I'm in the Army, good way to make money.

"I'll do my life, you do yours" doesn't sound like something you say to someone you want to keep around for the long haul. Perception is reality, if she thinks you're stagnant, then that's that.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:49 PM   #7
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1. leave the bitch or cheat on her...then leave her
2. join peace core


seriously. I work for the federal government as a public servant because I don't care about making a bunch of money for someone I don't care about, I like helping people, even if its a convoluted path to the product. I don't go to work every day to make money for some share-holder to maintain his yacht, I administer a program that helps people.

Life is bigger than money, so make your career something bigger.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:50 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wayne_curr View Post
She was even supportive of me when I decided to quit my $40/hr job and start living the american dream of student loan debt.

You need one like that.
I fish a lot but I rarely catch a marlin.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:59 PM   #9
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Turn up the boost, that seems to be the MiataTurbo.net answer to all problems. Plus it'll make you feel better about your life.
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Old 07-22-2009, 09:59 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kotomile View Post
I have a house on the other side of the country and I'm in the Army, good way to make money.

"I'll do my life, you do yours" doesn't sound like something you say to someone you want to keep around for the long haul. Perception is reality, if she thinks you're stagnant, then that's that.
I have no way of ensuring the house doesn't get vandalized... no one to live there while I'm gone. Well, I'm sure some freeloaders would, but to hell w/ that. I'd rather live in it, fix it up, sell and make a profit. How do you go about keeping the yard mowed/fixtures working/making sure no pipes have burst/etc from across the country?

The second point you make is great. Honestly it's something I've given a lot of thought lately. That is, how far into my future I see her. I guess realistically I don't see us making it through the next few years while she's gone at school 100 miles away... she doesn't either, as she's already voiced her opinion on that matter.

Hustler - inspirational on your career. I'd like to follow a path similar to that, helping others and all.... had ambitions to become a fireman. Hell, I'm 1/2 through all my certified training hours, but I haven't been active in that field in 4 years. I do miss it though. Just a TON of volunteer work leading up to the "eligibility" for being hired. No certainty. Lots of lay-offs in that lately too.
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Old 07-22-2009, 10:05 PM   #11
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She's probably already cheating on you, why she's started working out....

< I'm an *******
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Old 07-22-2009, 10:12 PM   #12
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chances are you are wasting too much life on MT and she's right. and she only brings it up because you dont have a 9 inch dong to cram up in her.

but some things you just gotta do and miataturbo is probably one of them. just try to regulate it some.
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Old 07-22-2009, 10:24 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Project84 View Post
...How do you go about keeping the yard mowed/fixtures working/making sure no pipes have burst/etc from across the country?

The second point you make is great...
Easy, just have good tenants. My first tenants were terrible (I expected much more from a Staff Sergeant) and my current tenant is my sister-in-law. Not everyone can have the luxury of having relatives as renters, true, but if it were Joe Anybody I'd be charging a lot more than I am now to help make up for the hassle of renting to strangers (I can't think of a better term than strangers ATM...) especially since property taxes have risen.

About the gf, it sounds like you know what the deal will eventually be. IMHO if you're thinking like you say you are then she's not "the one". If you just haven't gotten around to breaking up with her because you need a booty call (I can't think of a better term than booty call ATM...) until your relationship becomes long distance then that's your prerogative.
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Old 07-22-2009, 10:29 PM   #14
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dude...the economy sucks, you have no job, you haven't bought that house yet...do peace corps. If I had known of it, I would have done it too.
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Old 07-22-2009, 10:46 PM   #15
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y8s - the dong thing is off. No worries there.
- Maybe regulating the MT.net would be a good thing.

Koto - no way in hell I'd rent to someone I didn't know. You're lucky to have family in there now!

I've heard "the one" be mentioned from a lot of my friends (most of my friends are 30+ and married) so I assume "knowing" is a true occurance. I guess I just haven't felt it yet. Been really serious with 3 girls and thought it would be nice to be w/ them in the future, but never really felt like I "knew" any of them were "the one." Frustrating.
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:03 PM   #16
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women thrive off that "the one" ****. Just like a career path, or life in general...some of the choices and paths we take aren't a black and white right or wrong. I've met a few women that I could still be with and be happy. I could be writing code in a cube somewhere driving a Ferrari, trading stocks or selling real-estate and lease a Kia right now, but "Day of Terror" hit then Hurricane Katrina hit and it scored me a job that's turned out to be a path.

So she's most likely not "the one" and more likely "on of the few." Get your career and social role in order so then you can find a woman to serve as icing on the cake.
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:44 PM   #17
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Did you say you had a 4-year degree?
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Old 07-22-2009, 11:47 PM   #18
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FWIW my wife has complained about me spending too much time on here. She is somewhat right so I have tried to regulate it some. She goes to bed earlier than I so I wait until she is out then I come here for some late evening chill time.

My education is paying off for me even though I was a late starter, did not graduate until I was 27. Did not know what I wanted when I got out of High School. Eventually figured it out, went to college. I figured out what I was good at (Mech Engineering), went for it, and am very glad I did in retrospect. Now I have a great job that pays well.

Now all that aside, college is not for everyone, and is not the only path to success as shown by many. It is also not a foolproof path. Lots of well educated people end up not doing so well. I knew guys in the early 90s that had Post-Doctorate degrees in Biology that were making $25K a year doing research they did not like. More than one of them were not happy with their work.

I could ramble on and on... I think ultimately the key is to figure out what you are good at and/or what your bliss is. Pursue it, work hard, and paths to success will open up. More importantly you will enjoy the ride. Enjoying your work IMO is important than how much you make. Even if I could go get an MBA, and make double my salary in upper management at a Fortune 500 company, I would hate my job, and mostly hate life. I could do it, but I would not like it. I am a techie at heart.

There are lots of resources out there to help you figure out what you like and what you are good at. For example before starting college I took a couple of computer-based tests at a couple of college career centers; they were these looooong multi-choice qestionairres that ultimately boiled it all down to a summary that was remarkably spot-on for me. I am not sure what the contemporary version is but you can probably find something.

Or hell, if you like your current job and your current situation, then just keep doing what you are doing. All is well despite what the GF thinks. You definitely sound like you have your financial situation in order. But, look at the bright side. If you can keep things good with her, she will make some serious coin as a pharmacist when she graduates. More turboz!
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Old 07-23-2009, 12:31 AM   #19
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my gf might be annoyed by my presence here but I just tell her I volunteer for a small community and she doesn't bother me anymore.

at least she understands the "new posts" feature expires if I dont read fast.
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Old 07-23-2009, 12:36 AM   #20
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The reason your GF acts like a bitch around you is because after she's been with me, no one can compete. I showed her what it was like to be with a man, so its time to step up your game and be a man. Break that ho off!
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