I love news directors with a sensor of humor.

Last Friday, I'm driving home from the airport, listening to the local NPR affiliate, KPBS. It's approaching the top of the hour (4:00pm) and All Things Considered is doing the tease for the next block, before cutting away for the local break.

"... and coming up at 4:20 we'll take a look at a ballot initiative to legalize pot in California..."

That couldn't have been an accident.

 

Is raw pork juice directly in the eye a bad thing? I hope I don't wake up with a red swollen eye tomorrow. Goddamn packet of salt pork snapped back and flung juice directly into my eye. Thanks! At least I'll have some killer split pea soup when I wake up to carry for lunch tomorrow.

 

you'll get aids.

 

Porcine aids is no joke.

 

I have that already, I work in a medical lab. I like to dip my fingers in the HIV test serum and rub my eyes, like Russian roulette.

 

Ever taste Ebola? Its delicious, sort of tangy.

 

The machine shop did not put my oil squirter's in my box of parts and the kid at autozone did not know what plastigauge was. FML

 

well today was an eventful day!

started off good, finally got a cell phone again. now i can stay in touch with people. then went to work. then i started to get really bad pains in my head. not like headaches or migraines. the pain was/has been isolated to the right side and it fells like somebody is literally stabbing me in the brain. and it only last for a few min. this has been going on for about 2 weeks. so i finally got tired of it and went to the hospital to get checked out. so i leave work, i get a mile away and the altinator belt on my **** box (toyota tercel) snapped. now im stuck in the pouring *** rain. i call a ride and on our way to the hospital we went though an intersection. we get half way though the light and all of a sudden i see a bright flash. the interior of the car lit up white, purple, blue, orange and yellow. lighting stikes a powerpoll that was 10 feet from the truck. my heart was racing. i felt the pressure from that ****.

long story short. got a CT scan, no problems but i gotta go for a follow up with a neurologist. and lighting striking 10-15 feet away from you will almost make you **** your pants.

 

Stabbed in the brain, hit by lightning, and a broken alternator belt. I'll bet Dr. House could figure out how they're all related.

 

Dibs on whatever Miata **** Wonton has.

 

Maybe it's lupus.

 

No, it's sarcoidosis. It's that in 9/10 episodes. Seriously. If you watch the episodes consecutively and back to back, you begin to notice trends, one of which is that sarcoidosis is a potential disease in nearly every case.

 

I got pork in my eye today too. **** meat.

 

Visit to Hustler?

 

I always visit him after his track day to relieve his stress from going so outrageously fast all weekend. His new GF ain't **** to me.

 

i thought about that today!



MS is another as well.

 

Hutchinson

 

Yay, I picked up a loaner NA from a friend while my car is down. Car needs a little TLC and will get a few things fixed before going back to it's owner. At least I am mobile again and don't have to bum a ride from my friend in his super shitty Amigo...I literally cover my face when riding in that car with him.

 

I blew a hooker coupler this morning.

 

I think you've got an infarction.