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Old 07-09-2012, 11:37 AM   #261
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I'm getting old. Saturday I drank a lot, drove home and then had a headache for whole Sunday.

So basically my body can digest a metric ton of poison alcohol but my brain doesn't cooperate.
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Old 07-09-2012, 11:47 AM   #262
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welcome to my world
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Old 07-12-2012, 01:31 AM   #263
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Anyone else get the type of hangover that makes them not want to eat or drink anything, just sit in the fetal position and breathe heavily?
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Old 07-12-2012, 03:20 AM   #264
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I get the feeling where i feel dehydrated yet the stomach feels bloated up.
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Old 07-12-2012, 06:24 AM   #265
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----, nothing like sobering whiskey ***** in a bar I dont know in some damn place in this stupid city.
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Old 07-12-2012, 11:26 AM   #266
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I'll tell you drunk bastards a joke. (2nd time i'm writing this ----... page reloaded and erased everything the 1st time after i was nearly done )

So this dude meets this chick in the bar. Gorgeous chick blah blah. They share few drinks. One thing leads to another and she invites him over. When they enter her apartment she shows him around. This door is for the living room, this is for the bedroom, this is the bathroom... she goes "i'll take a quick shower, i'll be back in few mins, you can go wait in the living room for me. Watch some tv or something." Dude goes "Sure np."

She goes in the shower. The dude opens the living room door, turns the lights on to find a giant dog sitting on the couch. He quickly turns the lights off and closes the door. 10 minutes later the dude is still sitting in the hallway the chick is still in the shower.

After a whole night of drinking cranberry and vodka drinks, the dude feels like hes gotta take a dump. Sits there and waits, 10 minutes.. the chick is still in the shower. 10 minutes later.. no luck shes still showering. Waits another 10 minutes and is about to ---- his pants the chick is still in the shower. Looks around the other rooms, nope no bathroom so he comes up with a plan. I'll take a crap and say the dog took a crap. He goes in the living room, doesn't turn on the lights or anything. He squats next to the couch and takes his dump. All relaxed he goes back in the hallway.

Finally another 20 minutes pass and the chick comes out of the shower. She sees him sitting on the hallway floor and goes. Why are you out here? He goes "I saw the dog and didn't want to scare it." She goes. "Oh don't worry it's just a plush dog."
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Old 07-12-2012, 11:30 AM   #267
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Further proof that dudes who drink cranberry vodka never get laid
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Old 07-16-2012, 05:30 PM   #268
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thirdgen View Post
Here is my predictions for tonight into tomorrow morning for myself:
All you realy need to know is first line to bar tender
"what kind of alcohol is that Absinthe?"
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Old 08-04-2012, 09:58 AM   #269
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I've officially hit rock bottom:

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Old 08-04-2012, 09:59 AM   #270
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yes, that is menstrual blood
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Old 08-04-2012, 11:38 AM   #271
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Aww, pushy is a big girl now
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Old 08-04-2012, 11:44 AM   #272
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pusha View Post
yes, that is menstrual blood
remember to rinse with cold water to get it out. hot water will cook it in.
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Old 08-04-2012, 11:45 AM   #273
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bro those are her sheets, I don't care
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Old 08-04-2012, 11:28 PM   #274
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at least she started.
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Old 08-05-2012, 12:00 AM   #275
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Quote:
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at least she started.
Nice
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Old 08-05-2012, 10:01 AM   #276
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Old 08-06-2012, 06:52 PM   #277
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I. Am. Drunk.
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Old 08-06-2012, 07:22 PM   #278
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoly View Post
I. Am. Drunk.
And gay, fuxk you
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Old 08-07-2012, 01:33 AM   #279
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Quote:
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And gay, fuxk you
This is crazy.
I just met you.
But here's my number.
Call me maybe.
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Old 08-07-2012, 09:11 AM   #280
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^virgin
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